Days on the Creek

Reminder !

2010-08-08T11:06:00.000-04:00

Just a reminder that my blog has moved to WordPress. My new site is HERE . If you'd like to keep following me, pop over there and re-subscribe to my RSS Feed or Google Connect!

Exit, Stage Left

2010-07-24T15:09:00.000-04:00

If you missed my last post or tweets...I've moved to my blog to my own domain now. If you follow my feed or Google Friend Connect, you'll need to go re-subscribe at the new place. Also, if you have my badge/button on your blog, you'll need to go copy the code that links it to the correct blog.

Click here to go to the new Days on the Creek website.

Thanks!

Movin' On Up to the WP Side

2010-07-23T14:44:00.000-04:00

I finally put on my big girl panties and I'm making the switch from Blogger to WordPress.

I've been planning this for a few weeks. My domain was purchased and I had the hosting set up and ready but I was scared into inactivity at the thought of the actual move. So I idled away, occasionally messing about in Photoshop with various graphics options trying to decide what I wanted for my new platform, gravitating to a clean, light, less cluttered page.

When I found out my son would be away today and I'd have the house to myself, I challenged myself to make the move today. I didn't make an announcement though, just in case I ran into problems or chickened out.

I still have a lot of minor adjustments to make to the layout and some of the pages, but for the most part, it is open and ready for company. I'd love some feedback from you all, so leave me some comments and let me know what I can improve for your viewing pleasure!

Days on the Creek New Website

I decided not to use a redirect code here on the Blogger site to automatically load the new page yet, so make sure you resubscribe on the new page to the RSS feed or the Google Friend Connect if you want to keep me in your Reader! I'll dual-post for the next couple days on both with reminders to visit the new site.

Political Unrest

2010-07-22T19:11:00.000-04:00

Ring, ring, ring. *trips over dog, stubs toe on chair to get to the ringing phone*

Hello, My name is Blah, Blah, Blah and I'm running for Congress/Governor/Mayor/Trash Collector. Since I'm a member of the Republican/Democrat/Pastafarian party you'll want to vote for me because I stand for family values/want to deport all illegal aliens/have cool hair and a great smile. You'll also want to send me a big fat donation so I can continue to waste money to call people and irritate the hell out of them at the worst times of the day.

So begins the seasonal onslaught of pre-recorded campaign phone calls. I've received three so far today, usually during nap time (mine, not the kid's), dinner time or the only quiet time I have of the day. Even though we have a statewide No-Call list that I've put all of our numbers on, political campaign solicitation calls are exempt. And this is just the beginning. From past years' experience, I know that they get more frequent, more demanding and more annoying as the weeks go on.

Stabbity, stabbity, stab.

My Inbox is Possessed

2010-07-21T10:38:00.000-04:00

Close to four years ago, DSL capabilities finally made it to the Creek via BellSouth. Prior to that, we had to make do with either a satellite connection or *gasp* dial-up. Neither was very helpful to the gaming that I was into at the time so it was like the clouds parted, the sun came out and a chorus of angels began singing the day my DSL modem arrived.

At that time, we had to change all of our email addresses from the satellite service provider to the Bellsouth addresses. All good, no problems for the next couple years. Then AT&T took it over. They let us keep our @bellsouth emails, so we were still happy.

The next change ended our lovefest with Bellsouth/AT&T. For whatever reason, they switched their email viewer to Yahoo! which was not so much woohoo. I've used Yahoo in the past for gaming accounts and they've always had an issue with slow delivery. Sometimes an email would take several minutes to a few hours to show up in my inbox. Since the addition of all of the AT&T email customers? More than 50% of the time it takes DAYS for me to get emails. Its not unusual for me to receive stuff on a Saturday that was actually sent on Tuesday.

My husband, in the room right next to mine, sends me three emails with the information for the next newsletter and it takes FIVE days for them to hit my inbox. It wouldn't be so irritating if AT&T allowed us to use the old way of accessing our mail. As it is right now, there is no alternative so we just have to bend over and take it up the back door.

WTF Yahoo??

In more upbeat news, its Wednesday and that means its time for me to divulge my not-so-secret Blogger Crushes. Today I'm ~~stalking~~ crushing on two bloggers that I just found this week:
Suicide Blonde and Good Girl Gone Redneck

Check them out, peek in their windows and fondle the lingerie in their unmentionalbles drawer. You'll be glad you did!

Just Kill Me Now...

2010-07-20T13:22:00.001-04:00

My son is beginning to show an interest in music. I always dreamed of this when he was a baby. When I could introduce him to the joys of rock, R&B, rap and blues. But things started going badly early on.

It really began as a toddler when he was #1 Fan of The Wiggles, not that I'm sure you can really call that music. Its more of a nightmare I'm trying to forget. I still have flashbacks when I hear the phrase "hot potato". But, moving on.

His next favorite came from the Pixar movie "Cars". He loved that movie and one of the merchandising traps we fell into was to buy him the soundtrack. He quickly became enamored of Rascal Flatt's version of "Life is a Highway" and it was mandatory that it be played over and over and over again every time we drove anywhere.

To my horror, he also became a country music fan. The blame for that is solely his father's. Country is about the only thing he plays in his truck barring the occasional Elvis or Beach Boys song. This is why I bought an iPod to listen to during family trips.

In the car last week as he and I were heading to the store, he asked me to turn up the radio. I usually keep it muted because he likes to chatter non-stop, so this was a bit of a shock. It was no surprise to me that a kick-ass Led Zeppelin guitar riff began throbbing through my speakers from the classic rock station I usually keep my radio tuned on when I'm not listening to a CD. I think I heard something that sounded like "Change it please, I don't like rock." come from the vicinity of the backseat. Since any child of mine wouldn't or couldn't, ever utter that phrase, I must have been mistaken.

But I now wallow in a bottomless pit of despair this morning. This beautiful boy-child of mine, that shares half my DNA, that I carried for 9 months and had my abdomen sliced open from hip to hip to bring him into the world did the unthinkable today. My sweet-faced little angel snuggled up next to me as I tip-tapped away on my laptop and asked *dabs a lone tear* for me to *sniffles* find on Youtube *sobs* a Jonas Brothers song.

There is no way in forty fiery hells that this is my child.

Guess Who's Coming to Dinner?

2010-07-19T12:50:00.000-04:00

Its not unusual to see various examples of wildlife here on the Creek: rabbits, deer, raccoons, 'possums, snakes, and so many species of birds that I've lost count.

Last night, we had a new visitor. I walked outside to walk the dog and found this grazing in our front yard.

No, we don't have roaming herds of wild horses around the countryside here. I recognized it as belonging to the horse farm a couple houses down the road. So, I backtracked into the house to tell my husband he needed to go let them know we had one of their escapees. He glanced out the window and declared it could wait a while.

I gave him The Look, to which he proclaimed that if he left it out there a while, he wouldn't have to mow that section of the yard next weekend. Sighs.

I finally convince him to deal with it. Flash forward a few minutes to him, the boy, and part-time dog zig-zagging across the field in a green and yellow (John Deere style) golf cart trying to "herd" this horse back towards its home.

It just doesn't get much more hillbilly than that.

This Sunday, Courtesy of E.T.

2010-07-18T11:55:00.002-04:00

Its amazing what one small-ish furball can do to a household.

Typical Sundays on the Creek: Mommy wakes up around 7-ish because she can't break from the getting-up-early routine. Makes coffee as quietly as possible. Just isn't quiet enough because the boy comes pitter-patting into the living room demanding juice and cartoons. Drinks juice, ignores cartoons. Chooses to go wake up Daddy on his one morning each week he can sleep in. Grouchy Daddy gets up, gets dressed, drinks juice from jug. They leave to go work on tractors or yard work. Eventually show back up around 8 p.m. for dinner and bath times before bed.

Today on the Creek: Mommy wakes up at 6:30 a.m. to take dog that goosed her with its cold nose outside (I'd rather get that wake-up treatment than to get up and have to clean up messes, so its all good). Walks, feeds, waters dog, then makes coffee. Boy wakes up an hour later and plays with dog, leaving Daddy to sleep in til almost 10 a.m.??? Mommy checks on Daddy to make sure he's still breathing, then goes in the kitchen and makes bacon and toast hoping to lure Daddy from the bed. Family spends an enjoyable hour eating breakfast, playing with the dog and talking over our plans for the day before Daddy and mini-daddy leave for the day.

WOW!

Mornings like this have NEVER happened in the (almost) eight years since the birth of our baby. It seems there's nothing like a new pet to bring the family together.

Or we've adopted a very small, furry extra-terrestrial with really bad breath that's conducting alien mind-control experiments on us.

Either one works for me, 'cause life's been good today.

The Green-Eyed Monster Comes to Visit

2010-07-17T11:27:00.000-04:00

We've officially adopted our new fur baby. Meet Skipper.

We had to drive over an hour to get to the shelter he was at, but it was definitely worth it. My son and I went to pick him up and he was shy at first, but warmed up to us as we were waiting to sign all the paperwork.

It turned out that he was a wonderful car traveler. I had covered the seats and floor with towels just in case he got car sick, but he spent most of his time with his nose stuck in the air vent or sleeping on the floor.

He had one of the standard cocker spaniel cuts with furry legs and belly which was all matted up, so our first stop on the way home was at the groomers to have him shaved. We'll just start fresh on his 'do.

We finally got him home about 4 pm yesterday afternoon and since then, he's had no "accidents" in the house. He even woke up my husband around 5am to go outside, so we're thinking he was housebroken at some point. He also LOVES to play fetch and will even drop the ball in your hands or at your feet at the "Give" command.

Of course, he has his quirks. He doesn't want to eat his food out of a bowl like a civilized mutt. The very first thing he did after I gave him some food and water was to grab the handle of the bowl, turn his head sideways and dump his food onto the floor. I wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't seen it myself. This morning, he tried to turn it over with his nose. I stopped him with a No! and he resigned himself to doing it my way.

The biggest issue we have so far is Jealousy, with a capital J. Part-time dog is ticked off that not only is there another male dog, but that he gets to live inside. The boy is jealous because he thinks I'm giving more attention to the dog. And the husband is jealous that the dog won't go to him if me or the kiddo are in the room.

All in all, he's a great dog, a bit fragrant since he got neutered and can't have a bath yet, but still a good dog. He also has an extreme case of doggy breath.

This is his favorite spot so far, at the foot of my cedar chest where he can keep an eye on me and make sure I don't go anywhere in the house without him.

Dog Days, Part II

2010-07-14T13:35:00.000-04:00

One of my first blog posts here at Days on the Creek was about my search for a new family dog. My husband and I finally had to agree to disagree and in compromise we'll be getting two dogs, one for him that will live outside and one as an indoor pet for me.

The one thing we both do agree on is that we'll be adopting our pets from a shelter or rescue organization. His specifications are a little (okay, a lot!) more detailed than mine and thus more difficult to find. So, I've been scouring the local classifieds, as well as www.petfinders.com for a male, blond/buff cocker spaniel, 1-3 years old for the husband.

Yesterday, I found him. The. Perfect. Dog.

I also found out that I could adopt a child from a third-world country quicker and with less red tape. The shelter won't even let us come visit the dog and check its temperament until our application is reviewed and approved. Which they told me this morning usually takes about a week. A week? For a dog? Seriously?

In addition to the questions you'd expect, they also want to know how many hours a day will the dog be alone, what will you do with it when you go on vacation, how much will you spend a year on its care and medical expenses, what training methods will you use, what brand of food will you feed it, what will you do in the event of bad behavior or extensive medical costs....OMG!!! Writing my college entrance essays took less time than filling out their application. Plus they wanted two references and a vet's recommendation.

I'm all for being careful so they go to a good home, but gone are the days where you went to the shelter, fell in love with a dog and it was in your car on its way to his new house within the hour. No wonder the animal shelters are constantly begging for donations because of overcrowding.

I jumped through all their hoops, so hopefully I'll be bringing our new baby home next week.

Encyclopedia Emailia

2010-07-13T14:15:00.001-04:00

I'm on a little mini-vacation, but just so you don't get bored, I'm passing on an email I received about all the PSA emails so many of us have received in the past. Enjoy and I'll be back soon!

BEST EMAIL OF THE YEAR SO FAR

I want to thank all of you for your educational e-mails over the past year. I am totally screwed up now and have little chance of recovery.

I no longer open a bathroom door without using a paper towel, or have the waitress put lemon slices in my ice water without worrying about the bacteria on the lemon peel.

I can’t use the remote in a hotel room because I don’t know what the last person was doing while flipping through the adult movie channels.

I can’t sit down on the hotel bedspread because I can only imagine what has happened on it since it was last washed.

I have trouble shaking hands with someone who has been driving because the number one pastime while driving alone is picking one’s nose.

Eating a little snack sends me on a guilt trip because I can only imagine how many gallons of trans fats I have consumed over the years.

I can’t touch any woman’s purse for fear she has placed it on the floor of a public bathroom.

I MUST SEND MY SPECIAL THANKS to whoever sent me the one about rat poop in the glue on envelopes because I now have to use a wet sponge with every envelope that needs sealing.

ALSO, now I have to scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason.

I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl (Penny Brown) who is about to die for the 1,387,258th time.

I no longer have any money, but that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Bill Gates/Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their special e-mail program.

I no longer worry about my soul because I have 363,214 angels looking out for me, and St. Theresa’s Novena has granted my every wish.

I can’t have a drink in a bar because I’ll wake up in a bathtub full of ice with my kidneys gone.

I can’t eat at KFC because their chickens are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes, feet or feathers.

I can’t use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day.

THANKS TO YOU I have learned that my prayers only get answered if I forward an e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes.

BECAUSE OF YOUR CONCERN, I no longer drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet stains.

I no longer buy gas without taking someone along to watch the car so a serial killer doesn’t crawl in my back seat when I’m filling up.

I no longer drink Pepsi or Fanta since the people who make these products are atheists who refuse to put ‘Under God’ on their cans.

I no longer use Cling Wrap in the microwave because it causes seven different types of cancer.

AND THANKS FOR LETTING ME KNOW I can’t boil a cup of water in the microwave anymore because it will blow up in my face.. Disfiguring me for life.

I no longer go to the movies because I could be pricked with a needle infected with AIDS when I sit down.

I no longer go to shopping malls because someone will drug me with a perfume sample and rob me.

I no longer receive packages from UPS or Fed Ex since they are actually Al Qaeda agents in disguise. And I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a number for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Jamaica, Uganda, Singapore, and Uzbekistan.

I no longer buy cookies from Neiman-Marcus since I now have their recipe.

THANKS TO YOU I can’t use anyone’s toilet but mine because a big black snake could be lurking under the seat and cause me instant death when it bites my butt.

AND THANKS TO YOUR GREAT ADVICE I can’t ever pick up $2.00 coin dropped in the parking lot because it probably was placed there by a sex molester waiting to grab me as I bend over.

I no longer drive my car because buying gas from some companies supports Al Qaeda, and buying gas from all the others supports South American dictators.

I can’t do any gardening because I’m afraid I’ll get bitten by the Violin Spider and my hand will fall off.

If you don’t send this e-mail to at least 144,000 people in the next 70 minutes, a large dove with diarrhea will land on your head at 5:00 p.m. tomorrow afternoon, and the fleas from 120 camels will infest your back, causing you to grow a hairy hump. I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of my next door neighbor’s ex-mother-in-law’s second husband’s cousin’s best friend’s beautician . . .

Oh, by the way.....

A German scientist from Argentina , after a lengthy study, has discovered that people with insufficient brain activity read their e-mail with their hand on the mouse.
Don’t bother taking it off now, it’s too late.

A Taste of Love

2010-07-08T09:09:00.000-04:00

Today's love is one that is near and dear to my...stomach: Food. I love, love, love food.

Love those nibbly-type appetizers, especially if they're breaded, fried and oh so very bad for you.
Love snacks like chips, dips, chex mix, crackers, nuts and other salty treats.
Love pastas: red sauce, white sauce, cheese sauce, salads...yes, I'd like seconds please.
Fruits: Strawberries, pears, bananas, cantaloupe, plums--Yum!
Veggies: Not so much, but I do love potatoes, lettuce, lima beans and occasionally, green beans.
Desserts? Yes, please. Gooey chocolate, anything cream-filled, cheesecakes, pudding, ice cream. Oh gawd, YES!
But most of all? I'm a carnivore. Bring on the entrees. Italian, Chinese, Indian, Mexican, prepare it how you will, but bring on the meat! Fried, grilled, broiled, sauteed, baked, stewed, roasted *drools*

My love of food has also brought to me a love of cooking. I've been collecting recipes and creating some of my own for about twenty-five years now and watching someone take pleasure in something I've prepared is almost as good chowing down on it myself. As anyone that's followed my blog may know, I love to share my recipes as well.

I just made this last night with the intent of using the leftovers for tonight's meal. Not gonna happen because it was gobbled up by the family. I hope you enjoy it as much as we did.

Louisiana Red Beans & Rice

Ingredients:
1 pound dried red beans, soaked overnight then drained
10 cups water
1 pound andouille sausage, sliced in circles and quartered
1 large onion (preferably vidalia or sweet onion)
1 green bell pepper, seeded and chopped
1 red bell pepper, seeded and chopped (optional, I add it for color)
1 jalapeno pepper, seeded and chopped (optional)
8 cloves of garlic, minced
1 teaspoon ground black pepper
1 teaspoon Creole seasoning (or more to taste)
6 fresh basil leaves, chopped
1 ham hock
4 cups cooked rice

Directions:
1. Place the drained beans and fresh water into a crock pot on low heat. Do NOT use the water the beans were soaked in overnight.
2. In a skillet over medium-high heat, brown the sausage. Remove and add to crock pot. Save the drippings.
3. Add onion, chopped green and red peppers, jalepeno and garlic to the drippings and cook 5 minutes or until tender. Add the skillet items into crock pot.
4. Season mixture in crock pot with the ground black pepper and Creole seasoning. Add the basil leaves and ham hock.
5. Cover and cook on low for about 8 hours or until beans are tender, stirring occasionally and checking moisture level.
6. If the beans are too watery, remove lid and cook on high until texture is creamy.

*Instead of andouille sausage, I usually substitute kielbasa or smoked sausage
**Because of the sausage and the ham hock, don't add salt until tasting the cooked mixture or it may be too much

Its Just a Little Crush

2010-07-07T09:08:00.000-04:00

My second installment of my Week of Love is dedicated to my fellow bloggers. I love that they take the time to pour out their thoughts, dreams, problems and stories so we get a little glimpse of their lives, families and friends. I love being able to laugh along with them, share their heartbreaks and connect with them through similar experiences. And I mostly love that its all free! No service fees, no monthly charges!

When I started blogging, it was for personal reasons. Then I started getting comments and later, my first award and it was like getting a warm and enveloping hug from a beloved friend. I realized then that no matter what your reasons are for writing, blogging is about community. We expose our feelings and emotions through our writing, which can be scary, with hidden hopes that someone may understand us. That's why I started my Blogger Crush awards, to let a couple writers know each week that at least one person appreciates their efforts and loves what they do.

I have a special surprise this week: Another 2 for 1 Awards. Not only are the winners my Blogger Crush of the week, but they also get passed the Blog With Substance award that I received from Lauren at Her Silent Musings. Thank you so much Lauren! This award comes along with a few rules, which I'll list, but may not follow to the letter 'cause I'm a rebel like that.

The Rules for A Blog with Substance Award:
•Thank the blogger who awarded it to you.
•Sum up your blogging philosophy, motivation, and experience using five (5) words.
•Pass it on to 10 other blogs which you feel have real substance.

It doesn't say my blogging philosophy has to be an actual sentence, just five words. I only need one: Honesty. Everything you'll read here is a truthful look at me. What I love, what I don't love, what I find funny (even if my sense of humor may be a few degrees off normal) or what I need to vent about before I go nuclear.

But enough about me, on to the winners!

Pregnant...with Power Tools
Amy's Blam
Welcome to Mommyhood
Mommy Monologues
Musings from Mt. Rogo

Go visit all of these, you'll be glad you did. The winners can grab both buttons to display or secretly hide them in your underwear drawer, whatever floats your boat.

Okay, now I know the rules said to pass it on to 10 other bloggers, but I'm going to blatently break the rules and save the other five for some point in the future. HA! Take that, Establishment!

I'm Lovin' It

2010-07-06T12:21:00.001-04:00

(I totally stole the McD's tag line for my title)

So, yesterday I promised a week full of love and this holiday has totally messed up my week, but in the opposite way. I thought it was Wednesday and had a Blogger Crush/Award post all ready before I figured it out. Silly Mommy!

What's my love all about today then? I'm loving the fact that I've adopted (and kept to) the policy of keeping my home "visitor-ready". There was a time a few months back where I'd step out onto the porch when someone dropped by because my house was a undeclared disaster area. I would have been horrified for anyone to see the paths of destruction one boy and one husband could leave that one mommy couldn't keep under control.

So I love that my new attitude made this past holiday easy-peasy for me. A quick sweep of the kitchen floor and a swipe of a wet rag over the bathroom counter and I was ready! Finally, a no stress holiday.

And because I wasn't stressed out about the house, I loved having people over and really enjoyed the cookout, the socializing and the fireworks.

I also got to enjoy another love: photography. I took about 20 candid shots of the BBQ, selected a few nice ones and gave them a faded retro appearance. Then I created a mat with some papers and elements from Scrappin' Cop's Americana set.

P.S. - My husband doesn't smoke cigars, he was just using it to light bottle rockets. Thus the odd expression on his face.

Words to the Wise

2010-07-05T11:06:00.001-04:00

Thanks to Jerry at Shadowhouse Creations, I found an interesting tool to use to create word art called Wordle. It allows you to paste in a block of text or even the URL to a feed, it will pull out all the major words from the text and create a collage that you can then customize the layout, colors and even fonts.

It also has a couple interesting features: One is that the more a word is used in your text or feed, the bigger the font that word is shown in. The other cool feature is that you have the option to right-click on any word and remove it from the cloud.

In trying this out for myself by entering the URL to my blog's feed, I discovered something kind of alarming. Can you see what it is?

Yeah, I apparently use "hate" a lot. Too much.

So, its going to be the Week of Love here. I'm going to be working up a love list and share some with you every day to counteract all the hate I have going on here. Maybe by the end of the week my Wordle hate will be insignificant compared to my love.

Independence Day

2010-07-04T11:53:00.000-04:00

Just a quick post to wish everyone a Happy 4th of July (even if you're not an American, you can still have a happy day!).

I'd also like to thank Lauren at Her Silent Musings for the Blogger with Substance Award! Hop on over there and check out her posts and the great tunes she has on her player.

There are some rules to accepting the award and I promise I'll take care of all that in a future post, but we're expecting about 20 people here this afternoon for a BBQ and I've got lots of cleaning and prep to do.

Hope everyone has a fun and safe day!

Summer Hatin'

2010-07-03T09:20:00.000-04:00

I hate summer.

Mostly, I hate all the holidays that require cookouts. I hate the heat. I hate the bugs. I hate the bugs that get in the food so that I feel like I have to inspect every spoonful before it goes in my mouth. I hate the dirty, sweaty feeling that I have while sitting around socializing. I hate having to "inspect" myself, the hubby and the boy for ticks at the end of the day. I hate that I ask every day prior if we're having a cookout and just when I think I've dodged the bullet, its decided the morning of the holiday to have one. I hate how it always falls to me to rush out to the grocery store to pickup everything needed (because if I let the husband do it, he'll spend $200 on crap we don't need). I hate that the MIL has a no-alcohol policy. I might be able to deal with everything else after 3 or 4 ice cold beers.

I wonder if I could avoid this whole cookout thing if I scheduled an "inside" dinner first?

Its Saturday again and that means its time for the Lady Bloggers Tea Party! Follow the link, go check out some of the blogs and add yours to the link. I discovered so many new-to-me interesting blogs when I joined last weekend.

Tying One On

2010-07-01T13:20:00.000-04:00

My kid is smart.

Not genius-level, Einstein-brilliant, but he picks up things pretty quickly. He's made straight A's the past three years of school with no grade below a 98. He can identify by sight the year and make of just about any major name antique tractor. He can take mechanical things apart AND put them back together correctly.

He will be 8-years old in two months and he can do all these things with ease...but he cannot tie his own shoelaces. He refuses to learn.

He won't give a reason why, its "just because". And there's no arguing the point with him. His stubbornness is legendary (I know because he inherited it from me).

Up until this point, it hasn't been that big of an issue. I've been able to keep him in flip-flops, crocs, and tennis shoes with velcro straps. But as he grows, so does his foot and its much harder to find good-looking sneakers in the larger sizes. The last shoe-shopping trip took me to four different places before I found any in his size.

His school has instituted a "tennis shoe only" policy this year, so the crocs and flip-flops are no longer an option. Which means sometime in the next month, I will again have to attempt to find him some velco-strap tennis shoes. Or teach him how to tie his laces.

I don't see that happening.

He loves these, but Sketchers are hard to find around here for some reason

The Age of Watching

2010-06-30T14:01:00.001-04:00

I know I've mentioned before that my husband's hobby is restoring/showing antique tractors. There are several local organizations that promote this and he's currently serving his third term as President of one of them. He's been involved with this group for about six years and somewhere in that first year, I got drafted into doing their monthly newsletter.

By drafted, I mean there was no one else that could/would do it. It was my understanding when I committed to this that I would be provided all the information each month and all I would need to do is create the mailing database and layout, do the printing, collating, folding and mailing.

In reality, this is not how it goes and I hate, hate, hate having to do this each month. Before I can even attempt a layout, every article, announcement and list has to be edited for spelling, content, and grammar. And by edited, I mean completely re-written, by me. The other half of content I have to entirely write myself. Considering the most I know about tractors is which brand is which color, this can get very challenging each month.

To make an already unpleasant task worse, its also customary to write memorials for those members that pass away. I just completed one for the July issue and there will have to be another one in the August issue. Since the average age of the members is around 55-years old, its unfortunately becoming a more frequent occurrence.

Its really gotten me to thinking more about the fact that we're not "young" anymore. Our surviving parents, aunts and uncles are in their 60s & 70s, our cousins and even our friends are our age or older. We each have a brother that's younger by a couple years, but we're all entering the red zone.

Our bodies are starting to feel our years and we're entering the age of "watching": Watch your sodium intake, watch your blood pressure, watch your cholesterol. Watch as we start developing medical issues that we'll have to deal with the rest of our lives. Watch as the shelf starts filling up with prescription bottles of maintenance medications. Watch as we limp through the house at the end of a hard day of yard work or housework.

And it saddens me to realize our bodies are not just aging anymore, but growing old.

Fettuccine and Sunshine

2010-06-28T13:54:00.000-04:00

I'm a big fan of Italian food and one of my favorites has always been Chicken Fettuccine Alfredo. For many years I was reduced to either going out to a restaurant or using a bottled sauce to get my fix since I was kinda terrified to attempt to make it myself.

Then one day I was lunching at a friend's house and I loved, loved, loved the recipe she used to make hers. It reminded me of the kind you get at that famous Italian restaurant chain that shall not be named here. Upon request, she was kind enough to email it to me later. Apparently, this recipe has been passed along from friend to friend to friend so many times that I can't credit the original creator (I would if I could).

Because I'm such a giver, I'm going to share the sauce recipe with you my friends:

1/2 sweet butter
2 cups heavy cream
1/4 tsp. white pepper
2 garlic cloves, minced
1/2 cup grated fresh Parmesan cheese (not the dried kind in the shaker)
3/4 cup Mozzarella cheese

Melt the butter in a medium pan over low to medium heat. Add the cream, pepper and garlic and bring it to a simmer, stirring frequently. Add the Parmesan cheese and simmer about 10 minutes or until the sauce thickens and is smooth. Add the Mozzarella cheese, stirring often, until sauce is smooth again.

Add to your favorite pasta and top with grilled or sauteed chicken chunks.
(My notes: Serve fresh off the stove. As the sauce cools it tends to become lumpy or gritty. The flavor seems fine, but the texture isn't really appropriate for leftovers.)

Another lovely surprise awaited me when I awoke this morning. Sarah at Barefoot in the Prairie has given me the Sunshine Award. Thanks so much Sarah! You definitely want to hop over to her blog and check her out.

Now I get the pleasure of passing this award on to 12 other bloggers that make my days brighter. Most of these are new-to-me blogs that I found during the Lady Bloggers Tea Party this weekend. Something about them stuck with me and I wanted to show each one my appreciation. Please visit these ladies, you'll be glad you did.

~Southern Style~
Life Without Pink
Looks Great Naked
Daily Musings of The Girly Tomboy
Mama Rants
You Just Can't Google Everything
Generation X Mom
It's How She Rolls
Kimberly's Scribbles
Maxabella Loves...
Stiletto's and a Stroller Times Three
Stories from the Shoebox

Brown Kool-Aid at the Tea Party

2010-06-26T19:34:00.001-04:00

Its Saturday evening at 7pm and I'm so exhausted that I'm just now getting dinner started. I thought I was going to have a relatively easy day--it started well and went downhill fast.

First thing I did this morning was to join the Lady Bloggers Society Tea Party Social. I visited soooo many new-to-me blogs (plus I saw a few familiar faces) and a few even stopped by here. Helloooo to my new followers!

I wasn't allowed to revel for long as we've had a death in my hubby's family and even though the arrangements weren't made yet, I figured it would be Sunday/Monday. First thing I had to do was to color my gray roots because there was no way I could be seen at a family gathering looking like a skunk. That was two hours shot.

Since the hubs and kiddo had previous plans today, it was up to me to prepare the "funeral clothes". (We're such a casually clad clan that the only time we pull out the suits and dresses anymore is for funerals.) This meant two loads of laundry followed by two hours of ironing, at which time I discover there's a stain on the hub's dress shirt that can't be missed. I knew this would mean an emergency trip to HellMart. I'm not happy.

The choice came down to a long-sleeved shirt in the correct size or a short-sleeved shirt in one size larger. Thinking he'd prefer the short sleeves and the smaller sizes had been looking a bit, ummm...tight...around the gut (hey, I'm an awesome cook), I get the bigger one. Wrong answer. Who knew a man could be such a size-snob??? He wasn't happy.

Then I'm doing some touch-up ironing on his suit pants and discover a huge permanent marker stain that the dry cleaner had missed/not informed me of/whatever. I did some quick calculations and figured his jacket might just cover it. I'm thinking I'm just about done when the boy comes in from swimming crying with an earache. And we're out of drops. He wasn't happy.

So it was back to HellMart. The kid got his drops, the hubby got a new pair of pants and the long-sleeved shirt in the smaller size. They're finally happy. Am I happy? No. I still have to finish cooking dinner, then iron all the new stuff and the kid's clothes. Grrrr.

So in my growly whirlwind of trying to get things done as I was prepping all the veggies and meat for some Chicken Fried Rice, I noticed that the Kool-Aid pitcher was almost empty. The stars will fall from the sky and the earth will erupt in a firey explosion of magma and rock if the pitcher should become dry. To prevent the disaster in the most time-efficient way, I did the unthinkable: I made a new batch of orange with about an inch of grape still in the bottom, resulting in brown Kool-Aid. Wrong again.

But the look on both of their faces when they took the first sip of what they thought was ice tea? Priceless.

Guerrilla Salvation

2010-06-25T14:10:00.000-04:00

Between birth and around age 24, I was exposed to a lot of different religious belief systems: Presbyterian, Methodist, Catholic, Jewish, (Southern)Baptist and after college, many of the Asian religions. I eventually rejected organized religion and based my faith on a personal relationship between myself and God and even though it sounds like a casual thing, I do take it seriously.

I married a lapsed Baptist that doesn't attend services. We both agreed that we'd like for our child to learn of God, Jesus and the Bible and be able to make his own decisions when he's older about his own faith.

So it doesn't bother me that he occasionally goes with my MIL to her Baptist church or that he's attending a Vacation Bible School this week at another church with some of the other local kids. All this is fine and even encouraged.

What does bother me is that my son came home yesterday and announced he's been Saved. Its not him I'm angry with because with his limited exposure to Christian beliefs, he doesn't understand what it truly means.

Its the leader of the youth organization that's running the VBS for his underhanded tactics of addressing this with my son when neither his father or I were there. All my 7-year old guy knew was that "all the other kids were doing it". I casually asked him a few basic questions about what being Saved means or that Jesus died for our sins and he was clueless.

I'm livid that a youth leader would stoop to sneaky tactics like letting an child make an uninformed spiritual decision. Its these types of behaviors that caused a rift between me and church life. It took everything I had to be nonchalant and not let my feelings about this wash over onto my child because at this age, I don't want him to be influenced by negativity in relation to religion. There's enough time for him to develop that on his own later in life.

Sharing the Lurve

2010-06-23T10:29:00.002-04:00

Its another peaceful, easy Wednesday here on the Creek and that's only because its my MIL's day off and the kiddo is ~~torturing~~ ~~annoying~~ playing with her today. This means I can do some cleaning, color my gray roots, go to the wine store and pass on some Blogger love!

I want to thank Roxane at Days for giving me The Fabulous Sugar Doll Blogger Award! She's witty and wonderful and her taste in men and TV shows? Impeccable. So when you're done here, pop over to visit her blog, follow her and leave some love.

Now for the rules, which I'm going to break since I'm a rebel and that's just how I roll.

1. Thank the person who gave you the award. (Check)
2. Share 10 things about yourself.

My favorite ice cream flavor is Cookies n' Cream.
I used to play the flute. I wanted to learn the drums but my Mom thought that was too boyish.
I can't drive a stick-shift (manual transmission). I've killed 2 cars trying to learn.
The smell and taste of raspberries will make me puke.
I learned to type properly when I was 10. The last time I was tested, my typing speed was over 120.
Both of my grandfathers were alcoholics. There were many times when I thought I might be one too.
I supported myself by plasma donations for two months when I was in-between jobs.
I love roller coasters and spinny rides.
I quit smoking 1 year, 5 months and 29 days ago, after being a smoker for 18 years.
I fell over the side of a flight of stairs and fractured my skull when I was three.

3. Share this award with 10 other bloggers that you think are fantastic. On Wednesdays, I normally name my two Blogger Crushes for the week, but I'm going to combine that with the Sugar Doll award, so you get a 2 for 1 award! Make sure you click the links below and follow these bloggers because they are all fantastic!

4. Contact the winners and let them know. (Check)

Winners can right-click and "Save As..." both your badges to pass them along.

Ode to the Grocery Store

2010-06-22T11:19:00.000-04:00

I'm bored. Waiting-in-the-checkout-line-at-the-understaffed-grocery-store bored. So I start getting mentally silly (if I was verbally silly, they'd think I was crazy, but they don't really need to know that, now do they?) and thinking of all the reasons I loathe...loathe with the fires of a thousand suns...grocery shopping. And it was coming out in rhyme, so I rummaged through my suitcase (purse) for a scrap of paper and jotted down a few notes.

Later, as I was recuperating from the ordeal, I was watching "10 Things I Hate About You" (the movie, not the series), when Julia Stiles is reading her poem. The grocery store hate and the movie poem hate started co-mingling together and I couldn't get it out of my mind. So if I have to suffer with my own bad poetry, so do you. Cuz I'm giving like that.

I hate the way I have to grocery shop each and every week.

I hate my entry greeting from the seafood department's reek.

I hate the teenaged jerkoffs that speed around the parking lot.

I hate the healthy assholes that always take the handicapped spot.

I hate the way your chip aisle lures me with its siren's call.

I hate your skinny, too full aisles, I can't get past others at all.

I hate the fact my favorite treats are never shelved or stocked.

I hate when I need the restroom, the cleaning person has it blocked.

I hate when the store discontinues the things my family love.

I hate you put common items I need on shelves too high above.

I hate the time I waste while idling in the checkout line.

I hate the tweens that appear to bag everyone's food but mine.

I hate the heavy loads I carry from cart to car to house.

I hate that I am never helped, not ever by child or spouse.

I hate that shopping always makes me a grumpy, sweaty mess.

I hate the heacache that pounds inside my skull from stress.

I hate that when I'm through my back and muscles are in pain.

But mostly I hate that I know next week, I must do it all again.

I've been watching a lot of BravoTV lately and they've come out with a new promo spot that features all their reality stars at a party. What got me about it was the song that's playing. I'm not a big Macy Gray fan in general, but I LOVE this song.

Naughty Fairy Godmother

2010-06-21T11:13:00.000-04:00

So while I was miserable this weekend with a migraine, I limited my computer and TV time to avoid assaulting my eyes and ears with stimuli they couldn't handle at the time. I say limited because I just couldn't go cold turkey.

Sometime around midnight, I clicked on the TV and trolled the guide for something mindless to watch and happened upon one of my favorite movies, The Usual Suspects.

Now, I don't mind filthy language. In fact, in certain movies, it enhances the experience and in The Usual Suspects, I believe its necessary. I like the way it immerses me in the dark, lawless world the main characters live in.

What I didn't pay any attention to was what channel the movie was on. So the men had been rounded up and brought in for the lineup and are told to repeat a line on an index card, which includes a well-placed cuss word at the end of the sentence. What I wasn't prepared for was the phrase the network chose to replace the offensive part. Luckily, the line is repeated five times as each of the men say it because I wasn't sure I heard it right the first time.

Lemme set the scene: Five hardened criminals, pissed off that they'd been dragged out of their beds at an ungodly hour, looking all dangerous as they say "Hand me the keys you fairy godmother".

WTF???

Seriously? They couldn't have come up with something better than that???

I would have preferred the well-placed beep or even silence. I'll never be able to watch this movie again without flashing back to the fairy godmother incident.

================================================

I didn't forget...here's Monday's Mashup. Its an oldie but a classic by DJ Schmolli with a video mash by KvE. The Falco intro portion is kinda long, but stick with it. It gets much better.

Mom Win !

2010-06-20T19:36:00.000-04:00

I have triumphed over a holiday. Its a first. Usually they consist of running around at the last minute picking up and wrapping gifts, selecting a card, preparing someone's favorite meal and buying a cake. Procrastination is my modus operandi and I usually end up forgetting something.

But this year, by some twist of fate, I was prepared. I found the perfect gift and card for my husband (from our son *wink wink*) about a month ago. The pantry was stocked ahead of time with all the ingredients for his special meal and I made sure the bakery had his favorite cake ready to be picked up today. I even managed to remember to call my own father this morning.

Its kinda scary. I'm not quite sure how to react to this since its never happened before. Ever. I wonder if this is a new trend for me or if it will be back to normal for the next gift-giving, meal-making, gooey dessert-serving running-around-like-my-pants-are-on-fire occasion.

Samba Gnomes

2010-06-19T19:36:00.000-04:00

My head's been invaded by a clan of gnomes with gigantic hammers that have been beating out a samba rhythm on the inside of my skull for the past two days. Every four months or so, they decide to have their percussion party in my head, otherwise known as a migraine.

If I'm lucky and able to tend to it early enough, I can retreat to my soundless, lightless cave for a few hours and avoid the worst of the symptoms. Then there are the times when I have a very active 7-year old boy home for summer vacation that needs constant supervision. That's when I wish I could just chop off my own head.

I'm not sure which is worse, suffering through the migraine or having to work twice as hard to catch up on housework once I'm feeling halfway human again.

I forgot to mention in my last blog that I have a new tutorial up over at B's Blogpile on how to create a tradeable blog button and code for other bloggers to be able to link to you.

Snarly Beast and Blogger Crushes

2010-06-16T09:56:00.000-04:00

WARNING NSF Children: Today's post deals with icky female subjects and has an f-bomb that is included in the quoted letter.

The following is an article that was made popular about 3 years ago. I'm including it in my post today because 1) its just so damn funny and 2) it perfectly illustrates my thoughts on the subject.

An Open Letter to James Thatcher, Brand Manager, Proctor and Gamble

Dear Mr. Thatcher,

I have been a loyal user of your Always maxi pads for over 20 years, and I appreciate many of their features. Why, without the LeakGuard Core™ or Dri-Weave™ absorbency, I'd probably never go horseback riding or salsa dancing, and I'd certainly steer clear of running up and down the beach in tight, white shorts. But my favorite feature has to be your revolutionary Flexi-Wings. Kudos on being the only company smart enough to realize how crucial it is that maxi pads be aerodynamic. I can't tell you how safe and secure I feel each month knowing there's a little F-16 in my pants.

Have you ever had a menstrual period, Mr. Thatcher? Ever suffered from "the curse"? I'm guessing you haven't. Well, my "time of the month" is starting right now. As I type, I can already feel hormonal forces violently surging through my body. Just a few minutes from now, my body will adjust and I'll be transformed into what my husband likes to call "an inbred hillbilly with knife skills." Isn't the human body amazing?

As brand manager in the feminine-hygiene division, you've no doubt seen quite a bit of research on what exactly happens during your customers' monthly visits from Aunt Flo. Therefore, you must know about the bloating, puffiness, and cramping we endure, and about our intense mood swings, crying jags, and out-of-control behavior. You surely realize it's a tough time for most women. In fact, only last week, my friend Jennifer fought the violent urge to shove her boyfriend's testicles into a George Foreman Grill just because he told her he thought Grey's Anatomy was written by drunken chimps. Crazy! The point is, sir, you of all people must realize that America is just crawling with homicidal maniacs in capri pants. Which brings me to the reason for my letter.

Last month, while in the throes of cramping so painful I wanted to reach inside my body and yank out my uterus, I opened an Always maxi pad, and there, printed on the adhesive backing, were these words: "Have a Happy Period."

Are you fucking kidding me?

What I mean is, does any part of your tiny middle-manager brain really think happiness—actual smiling, laughing happiness—is possible during a menstrual period? Did anything mentioned above sound the least bit pleasurable? Well, did it, James? FYI, unless you're some kind of sick S&M freak girl, there will never be anything "happy" about a day in which you have to jack yourself up on Motrin and Kahlúa and lock yourself in your house just so you don't march down to the local Walgreens armed with a hunting rifle and a sketchy plan to end your life in a blaze of glory. For the love of God, pull your head out, man. If you just have to slap a moronic message on a maxi pad, wouldn't it make more sense to say something that's actually pertinent, like "Put Down the Hammer" or "Vehicular Manslaughter Is Wrong"? Or are you just picking on us?

Sir, please inform your accounting department that, effective immediately, there will be an $8 drop in monthly profits, for I have chosen to take my maxi-pad business elsewhere. And though I will certainly miss your Flexi-Wings, I will not for one minute miss your brand of condescending bullshit. And that's a promise I will keep. Always.

Best,

Wendi Aarons
Austin, TX

Wendi Aarons' website

And that pretty much sums up how I feel about this whole monthly thing. Happy will never describe it. Never, never, never! Its not about PMS, its about not being regular and why to this day I hate any kind of surprises. Its about the fact that I can't use tampons and the fact that pads are uncomfortable, chafing and stinky. Its about never knowing how long my unwelcome visitor is going to be hanging around. Might be 3 days, might be 7.

And because of all this, once my surprise gets here, I'm a grumpy, grouchy, snarly beast until its gone. And I hate being that way. And to all the women who celebrate their monthly gift as an affirmation of everything womanly--BITE ME! You love it so much, you can have mine too. Double your pleasure, double your fun.

Wednesday Blogger Crushes:
Even though I'm a Snarly Beast right now, I still got the love for my fellow bloggers. Here's my two crushes for this week. Make sure you go check them out. If you want to copy the button and send the love out to your crushes too, be my guest.

Roxane at Days

and

Origami Hour with Henry Silva

Summer Vaca is NOT Condusive to Blogging

2010-06-15T12:16:00.001-04:00

The noise a 7-year old boy makes in an average day of playing is cutting into my blogging time. I get about one hour of peace and quiet each day during the week during summer vacation. All of his toys make some kind of noise that makes my eyes-cross and every nerve seize up (not bought by me, of course). I'm on the verge of sanity and I've already started the countdown until the first day of school (55 more days). August 9th can't come fast enough.

Since I can't seem to think straight today, I'm going to steal an idea from Katie at Desperate for Coffee

Here's my 99 Things:
**edited to add: The things crossed off are the ones I've done.

1. ~~Started your own blog~~
2. ~~Slept under the stars~~
3. ~~Played in a band~~
4. ~~Visited Hawaii~~
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. ~~Given more than you can afford to charity~~
7. ~~Been to Disneyland (Disneyworld)~~
8. Climbed a mountain
9. Held a praying mantis (Eww, never intentionally)
10. Sang a solo (Never gonna happen)
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visted Paris
13. ~~Watched a lightning storm~~
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child (I am adopted, does that count?)
16. ~~Had food poisoning~~
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown your own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. ~~Had a pillow fight~~
22. Hitch hiked
23. ~~Taken a sick day when you're not ill~~
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. ~~Seen a total eclipse~~
30. ~~Watched a sunrise or sunset~~
31. ~~Hit a home run~~
32. Been on a cruise
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community
36. ~~Taught yourself a new language~~
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone Rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo's David
41. ~~Sung karaoke~~
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Africa
45. ~~Walked on a beach by moonlight~~
46. ~~Been transported in an ambulance~~
47. ~~Had your portrait painted~~
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. ~~Kissed in the rain~~
53. ~~Played in the mud~~
54. ~~Gone to a drive-in theater~~
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. ~~Started a business~~
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies (I was a Camp Fire Girl)
62. Gone Whale Watching
63. ~~Got flowers for no reason~~
64. ~~Donated blood, platelets or plasma~~
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. ~~Bounced a check~~
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Save a favorite childhood toy
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten Caviar (Ugh, not gonna happen)
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. ~~Been fired from a job~~
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. ~~Broken a bone~~
78. ~~Been a passenger on a motorcycle~~
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Publish a book
81. Visited the Vatican
82. ~~Bought a brand new car~~
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. ~~Had your picture in the newspaper~~
85. ~~Kissed a stranger at midnight on NYE~~
86. Visited the White House
87. ~~Killed and prepared an animal for eating~~
88. ~~Had chickenpox~~
89. Saved someone's life
90. Sat on a jury
91. ~~Met someone famous~~
92. ~~Joined a book club~~
93. ~~Gotten a tattoo~~
94. ~~Had a baby~~
95. ~~Seen the Alamo in person~~
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. ~~Owned a cell phone~~
99. Been stung by a bee

Mashup Monday

2010-06-14T07:17:00.000-04:00

Today's offering is brand new (just released at the end of last week) and it is amazing.

My post last week mentioned that a great mashup would be seamless. This is hard enough to do when its only 2 or 3 songs being melded together. Today's mashup was twisted from fifteen separate songs! Using multiple songs is a specialty of the producer highlighted today, DJ Earworm, and its done flawlessly in this mashup and video. So here's "Like, OMG Baby" by DJ Earworm. The track listing is shown below.

    * Alexandra Burke - All Night Long
    * Cheryl Cole - Fight For This Love
    * Chipmunk feat. Esmee Denters - Until You Were Gone
    * Dizzee Rascal - Bonkers
    * Ellie Goulding - Starry Eyed
    * Jason Derulo - In My Head
    * JLS - One Shot
    * Justin Bieber - Baby
    * Ke$ha - Tik Tok
    * Pixie Lott - Mama Do
    * Rihanna - Rude Boy
    * Scouting For Girls - This Ain’t a Love Song
    * Tinie Tempah - Pass Out
    * Usher feat. Will.I.Am - OMG
    * The Wanted - All Time Low

There's also several new items over at the Blogpile: more paper sets, a twill tag sidebar header set and sometime today, I'll be posting a new tutorial on how to create those cute clickable blog badges everyone has. Click on the button to go check it out.

School Daze

2010-06-13T18:43:00.001-04:00

If you're a regular follower here, you know of my recent fascination with HTML. I've been studying bits and pieces I find on the internet or portions of code in the Blogger templates. So while I now know how to make a clickable button or format a table, I wasn't really understanding what I was doing. It was time to get serious. I ordered a For Dummies book.

I chose a For Dummies-style book because I know me. If I'm studying on my own from the ground up on a subject that's completely foreign to me, its best to use a format of small words and lots of pictures. Once I get a basic grasp, then I can geek-speak with the best of them.

HTML, XHTML & CSS for Dummies arrived on Thursday, along with its accompanying CD-ROM. 920 pages. Wow. It would make a perfect spider-smoosher. Or doorstop.

My first opportunity of being alone came on Saturday morning, so I dug into the first chapter with coffee in one hand, a croissant in the other, the book on my lap and my laptop ready and waiting for me to start coding.

Its now Sunday evening and I'm on page 78 of 920. I have a beautiful rainbow of post-it tabs marking important parts and I have an eye-strain headache, but I learned a few things. I can code a blank page to say, "This is the first web page I've ever made and I'm extremely proud of it. It is so cool!". I can make a list that's either ordered, unordered or something else that I've already forgotten. I can make a table (which I already knew, remember?).

Studying sporadically for two days and that's it. Groundwork is sooo boring! But I'm committed to this. Next on the syllabus: the various types of links. Yaaawn.

You're Cut Off

2010-06-11T11:56:00.000-04:00

VH1 has this new "reality" show that just started last week.

Imagine several spoiled-brat princesses out shopping at the mall being filmed for what they think is their fabulous lifestyle. All at once, all of their credit cards are declined. They are ushered into a backroom where a life coach shows them videos of their families. They all have one thing in common: Their families have now cut them off financially.

The life coach then informs them they must learn how "normal" people live in order to appreciate the value of a dollar and earn the right to return to their family's' good graces (and money).

Needless to say, the bimbettes are in various states of shock ranging from anger (Oh no he DIDN'T!) to disbelief (How can he love me and cut me off???). All are equally amusing.

These "ladies" majored in Gucci 101, have the IQ of a gnat, have never done any of their own housekeeping or even held a job. One claims to work, but strangely doesn't know even the most the basic details of her profession.

I don't know about anyone else, but I get a malicious thrill as these twits are introduced to their new mode of transportation, a minivan (What? No Limo? Ewww). Their new home (OMG, we're in the projects. We're like lower middle class now). And the fact that they have to cook their own meals and serve themselves (I've never cleaned a day in my life and now's not the time to start).

Some of the opening show's highlights came during their first challenge in which they have to downsize their wardrobe to fit into a duffel bag before entering the house. One chickie pulls our a bottle of champagne and glass from her luggage. WTF??? Another Einstein shows later how forward thinking she was in her selections when she wears the sexy maid's outfit she put in her duffel bag so she could cook dinner.

Topping off the night, it shows various cliques of the mental giants backstabbing each other and discussing how dumb their housemates are.

I don't care how much money or assets someone has, is there really any excuse for parents raising their children with this sense of entitlement? To be so pampered that they don't even know how to take care of themselves without servants?

As disgusted as I am at how they ended up this way, I'll still be watching transfixed each week to see the expressions on their plastic and botoxed faces as they get a healthy dose of reality.

X-Rays and Pixie Sticks

2010-06-10T11:56:00.002-04:00

I wrote the draft of this post and two others on earlier this week while the ideas were still fresh in my head. Yesterday, one of my favorite bloggers (Holly from Are You Serious?) mentioned this exact subject as part of a list and I was all OMG, I can't use that idea now! What to do, what to do??? Then I got over myself and decided to post it anyway.

I'm not a small woman. Maybe in height, at 5'2", but not in "width".

Since high school, I've never been x-ray thin and I'm okay with that. When a hormone imbalance causes me to gain 30 pounds over my normally overweight self in the last year, its kinda not okay. But I'm dealing with that.

What I'm really not okay with is opening "plus-sized" catalogs and seeing the models wearing no more than a size 8. When are they going to realize that outside of the modeling world, size 8 is a pixie stick? If you go to the mall, but can't fit into any of the clothes, then you are Plus-Sized.

When I open a catalog at home from one of the plus-size specialty stores, I don't wanna see size 8s modeling the clothes I'm considering buying because it won't look the same on me.

I can't even count the amount of time I've wasted ordering, waiting, trying on, then returning items because the floral print that looks cute on the model, looks like a grandmotherly housedress or a shower curtain on me. But then that would be the point, wouldn't it. Sucker us deluded fools into buying something, then hope we're too embarrassed to return it.

Here's an idea: if you're going to market clothing in a certain size range, use models that are no smaller that the middle of that size range. Catalogs that specialize in sizes 16-26 should use models wearing size 20 clothes. How's THAT for a little honesty in advertising?

New from the Blogpile:

See that label at the top of my blog that says "Fave Blogs" and how it has rows of blogger button links with more than one on each line? As promised, I've written a tutorial on how to set up the HTML code for that! Just click on the Tutorials tab at the top of the Blogpile page. There is also a paper set in Maroon & Beige and a set of sidebar headers that look like cardboard. Just click on the Blogpile button over to the right to pick these up.

My Wednesday Runneth Over

2010-06-09T12:24:00.001-04:00

Best. Cartoon. Name. Ever.

Kick Buttowski: Suburban Daredevil.

Relatively new on the Disney Channel this year, he's part elementary school kid/part Evel Knievel. He's an adrenaline junkie planning and performing stunts on his skateboard, rollerblades, piano, giant plastic bubble, whatever works.

Personally, I think its a cute show. Then I get mommy-vision: Is Kick Buttowski an appropriate name for my son to be hearing? I know its Disney, but they've changed over the years. I know when I was 7 yrs. old, "butt" wasn't allowed in our vocab.

I also wonder if allowing him to watch these dangerous stunts won't give him "ideas". I remember pshawing when Parent Groups raised such a stink about violence in cartoons, like Roadrunner and Coyote. I thought how utterly ridiculous that they would think even a child couldn't tell the difference between real and make-believe. And now I find myself asking my son, "You know that's only a cartoon, right?"

But parental concerns aside, the name Kick Buttowski? Genius.

Wednesday Blogger Crushes:

Without further ado, here are my weekly blogger crushes. Though relatively new to my daily must-reads, I find myself ~~stalking~~ checking them frequently throughout the day in anticipation of a fresh post.

Katie from Katie's Dailies and Jessica from Punk Rock Mama

Keep up the blogging yumminess Ladies! You can right click and save the badge if you have an awards section and don't forget to pass the award on to a couple of YOUR Blogger Crushes. If anyone else wants to play along and show some love to their crush, go right ahead.

New At the Blogpile:

I just posted two very delicious paper sets in Chocolate Mint and Strawberry Caramel. Yum! Also a set of sidebar header alphas made of some grungy tiled letters. Click on the Blogpile button near the top of this page to go grab them. Quick! Go!

An Ill Wind Just Blows

2010-06-08T10:14:00.000-04:00

I discovered something this morning. My son is rotten.

Yes, spoiled rotten by his dad and granny, but that's not what I meant. I mean he has gas. Very. Bad. Gas.

So bad that I could actually see it, manifesting itself as a noxious cloud hovering over him. And then the stench hit me and my nosehair caught fire, saving me a ton of grooming time, but I digress. Even the tang of the singed nostril hair wasn't enough to filter my son's rank butt-funk.

My delicate sense of smell was assaulted by a cross between year-old eggs, curdled milk and a decaying animal. I even threw up in my mouth a little.

He finds my reaction hilarious. So funny in fact that he now makes a big production prior to ripping one. His downward-facing dog position rivals any yoga master's and gives me fair warning to run. Fast.

I told him he'd better go check his tighty-whiteys, cuz something that smells that bad HAD to have made a mess. As I sit here in a military-grade gas mask, I just noticed the paint is starting to peel off the walls.

On the bright side, its a good day to make tuna casserole or salmon patties. It will be more effective than air freshener to try to make the house smell better.

Blogpile news: There are two new background sets and a set of sidebar headers available today. Click the B's Blogpile button to check them out.

Its Mashup Monday

2010-06-07T12:37:00.000-04:00

I decided after the favorable response to the mashup I posted last week and the amount of people who were just being introduced to them for the first time that I'd include one each week.

I have very high standards when it comes to the mashes I love. A great mashup will take the elements from the different songs and meld them together seamlessly, there won't be any discordant notes, the beats will match and there won't be any awkward starts, stops or pauses. While there are a lot of mashers out there, I'll only be featuring the true artists that can meet all these requirements.

This weeks offering is a Pop/Dance selection from a collaboration of DEEP/BLK & Marc Johnce and features Kylie Minogue/Gwen Stefani/La Roux. This one also has a video edited together from the separate track videos.

In other news: There are several new paper sets and a new sidebar header set on my other website. I also have a bunch more in the works. Click on the B's Blogpile button to go check them out!

Blah Blah Blah

2010-06-06T22:35:00.000-04:00

Not talking about the Ke$ha song, I'm referring to the way I've felt all day.

It actually began last night about 11:30 p.m. when the hubby dropped a bombshell on me that he knew I wouldn't be happy about. In the nine years of our relationship, we've never had a real fight and I can count the "differences of opinion" on one hand. It always involves him planning something major that affects us both, without my knowledge or input. It usually goes like this: He drops some surprise on me (not a good kind), I tell him its not a good idea, he gets mad and walks off and I'm left simmering because he won't even listen to my reasoning.

So, my bad mood continued through my night of tossing and turning on the couch, unable sleep because I was so angry with him. After two hours sleep, I gave up at 5 a.m. and got up for the day and made coffee.

I worked for a couple hours in Photoshop, it seemed to sooth my mind and I was able to come up with a compromise to hopefully end the cold war between us. Then I had to fidget around for another hour waiting for him to get up. Even though the situation was resolved, the endless hours of the night that I was left alone with my anger took its toll on me.

My horrible mood eventually morphed into that Blah Feeling. The kind that nothing interests you and the minutes pass like hours. I surrounded myself with my comfort foods and pulled out the newest release from one of my favorite guilty pleasure authors: Laurell K. Hamilton.

The Anita Blake series is usually explicit and full of violence, so it would have been the perfect escapist Sunday afternoon fodder I needed to lose my mood. This one, not so much.

I don't want to include any spoilers so I'll just say there was still plenty of raunch and fighting, but the overall sadness of where this book takes you didn't do much to change where my head's been at today. It was still an excellent addition to Anita's (and her men) story, but so not what I was needing.

As Promised...

2010-06-05T21:46:00.000-04:00

I know I mentioned in yesterday's post about my new project, so without any further ado...

I'll do the coding for a link button to put on my sidebar tomorrow, but for now, it can be found HERE.

Its pretty simple at the moment, featuring some basic patterned papers (in rainbow colors that are great to use as backgrounds to build upon) and some blog button graphics. All items are free to download for personal use only. My goal is to also include tutorials on Photoshop CS4, Blogger features and HTML coding.

I'm currently working on a series of matching striped and plaid papers in a variety of bright summer colors. I'll try to remember to include a little blurb here when I add new features there.

Days of Wine and Sunflowers

2010-06-04T11:34:00.000-04:00

Eureka! I've done it!

I've discovered what it takes to nourish my creativity. One and a half glasses of liquid gold before bed and overnight I turn into a freaky melange of an HTML Einstein and a Photoshop Michelangelo. Okay, maybe that's a bit of an exaggeration, but I'm pretty proud of my accomplishments this morning. I'm sure it was just a coincidence, but ya never know...

I awoke so inspired this morning that I only did a quick scan through email and comments before hitting Photoshop. I wanted to redesign my blog badge to use the font I have on my header. I thought it would be cute to put it on a Flair button template along with my sunflower. It turned out better than I expected. I was even motivated enough to create the whole blog badge sidebar from html code instead of using the Blogger picture widget. Look over on the right sidebar (no, the other right) for my new badge.

That progressed so smoothly that I hopped back into PS and created my own Twitter button (I had been wanting to make my own using my blog colors for a while). Thanks to Scrappin' Cop for the chick template! The patterns used on the feathers and the body are ones I created last week during a cleaning break. Again, I was able to write the code myself instead of relying on a Blogger widget.

Last week, I had learned how to put a signature at the bottom of all my posts and also designed and coded my post dividers. I'm just hugging myself all over for conquering mommy-brain (among other things) to figure these things out. I've started on a little side project--creating a separate digital crafting blog to offer my creations and custom design services once I'm a little more confident in my abilities.

Yesterday came and went without me noticing that it was my one month Blogversary. Who-da-thunk-it? I managed to post every day but one and having that solo black mark on my record is giving me the guilts. Also, after two weeks of struggling with Google Analytics, I've finally got the code installed properly and its now working.

UPDATES:
In sadder news, one of my ducklings has disappeared. We're not sure if it wandered off, got hit by a car or was killed by the other local wildlife. It makes my heart twinge a bit.

If you've followed my blog for a bit, you may remember that we're in search of a new pet dog. This past weekend the boy came in with his arms full of fluffy squirmy Labrador and proclaimed that we had a new puppy. He (the puppy, not the boy) ran around on the floor for a few minutes before I ushered him and the kiddo back outside. I was a little put out that I wasn't consulted on the decision since I didn't want a Lab. The good news is he was playing a joke on me and the puppy belonged to the neighbors. The bad news is I now have fleas in the living room.

The Day After

2010-06-03T11:22:00.000-04:00

Its now the calm after the storm on the Creek. The parental visit is a thing of the past and I'm now drifting along in a quasi shell-shocked state. I can enjoy my morning coffee without feeling guilty that I should be doing 1001 things and I'm indulging myself with a frosting-laden chocolate chip cookie for brekkie. Life is good.

All in all (despite all the preparations) it was a great visit. Mom and I chatted like long-lost BFFs, we shared creek-area gossip with the MIL, there were no lectures (yet), and Dad, the bbq afficianado actually liked my homemade sauce enough to have seconds.

After dinner, the estrogen-challenged went outside and entertained themselves with mini-tractor races (WTF???) while the women-folk stayed in and cleaned up the dinner mess (again, WTF???).

After dessert, there was much hugging and drive safelys, leaving only the dust cloud as their SUV lumbered its way down the gravel driveway.

I literally slumped over on the couch about 30 minutes after they left and was comatose until 3am this morning. I vaguely registered the time, discarded the idea of moving to the bed since my muscles refused to work and promptly fell back asleep until the blissful hour of 8am.

Even though there is neglected laundry (artfully hidden for the past 2 days), I'm taking the day off. The house is clean and there is enough leftover food that I don't have to cook tonight.

And I chuckle to myself as I contemplate my revenge--Being able to watch my mom follow my son around with a damp washcloth and a bottle of cleaner when we go to visit them in about a month.

Blogger Crushes II

2010-06-02T10:30:00.000-04:00

Its Wednesday and time for me to declare my infatuation to the bloggers I'm crushing on this week. Both of these authors are new on my "To Follow" list, but I've thoroughly enjoyed their posts.

First to the Cheeseboy over at The Blog O' Cheese. Anyone that can make me boo-hoo from the uber-cuteness of first graders singing Queen and The Clash gets my complete adoration!

Second goes to Jess at The Bottle Chronicles. I've faithfully followed her progress through baby mohawks, staple removals, wedding plans and the evil that is Staples.

Here's your badge, be sure to pay it forward and send it to your favorite Blogger Crushes. If anyone else wants to play along at home, right click the badge and save the image, then pass it along to your crushes.

Dishpan Hands and Dustmop Dancin'

2010-05-31T20:43:00.001-04:00

Yet another day of nonstop cleaning comes to an end in preparation for the parentals. I've been perpetually high for almost 48 hours due to breathing the fumes of all the cleaning products I've been using.

In an effort to try to make it more fun, I play music to sing and dance to as I go about the chores. No need to dust-mop the wooden dining room floor when I can do the Risky Business slide along with Bob Seger. Singing with Madonna into my soup ladle and washing dishes makes the time pass quickly (until I inhaled a mouthful of dishwashing soap bubbles). I waltzed with the vacuum cleaner to country, shook my dustrag pompoms to Toni Basil's Mickey and I'll even admit to salsa-ing to Ricky Martin as I cleaned out the refrigerator.

Luckily, I love music. All kinds of music. My most favorite way to listen to music though is in mashups. What's a mashup? When you combine two or more songs to make a new sound, like taking the lyrics of one and mixing it in with the music of another. Mashups were mostly an underground culture until they gained mainstream publicity by being featured in a couple episodes of Glee. There's a few websites that specialize in promoting them and you can even find videos on YouTube.

This one doesn't have a video, but here's a sample:

Try Googling for mashups, you may find a whole new way to enjoy some of your favorite songs.

Feelin' Saucy!

2010-05-30T20:12:00.000-04:00

Time has been especially precious the last couple days and will remain so until the end of the week so I can't promise the next few posts to be humorous or thought-provoking. I'm physically exhausted and mentally drained.

In honor of Memorial Day and all the BBQ-ing that will be going on, I am going to do share something I don't normally: my recipe for Bourbon BBQ Sauce. As posted, the sauce is more liquid, perfect for marinating or for shredded pork. You can use more tomato paste and less ketchup to make it thicker for baking or grilling. The alcohol in the bourbon will cook out.

Bourbon BBQ Sauce

Ingredients

1/2 onion, minced
4 cloves garlic, minced
3/4 cup bourbon whiskey
1/2 teaspoon ground black pepper
1/2 tablespoon salt
2 cups ketchup
1/4 cup tomato paste
1/3 cup cider vinegar
2 tablespoons liquid smoke flavoring
1/4 cup Worcestershire sauce
1/2 cup packed brown sugar
1/3 teaspoon hot pepper sauce, or to taste

Directions

1. In a large skillet over medium heat, combine the onion, garlic, and whiskey. Simmer for 10 minutes, or until onion is translucent. Mix in the ground black pepper, salt, ketchup, tomato paste, vinegar, liquid smoke, Worcestershire sauce, brown sugar, and hot pepper sauce.
2. Bring to a boil. Reduce heat to medium-low, and simmer for 20 minutes. Run sauce through a strainer if you prefer a smooth sauce.

I Can See Clearly Now

2010-05-29T09:44:00.003-04:00

During my cleaning frenzy in anticipation of the parental visit of doom, I'm really starting to feel my age. Scrubbing floors, moving furniture and washing windows has left me almost unable to move without muscle aches. But nothing has really made me feel as old as my vision.

On my best of days, my eyesight is horrible. I started wearing glasses for distance vision when I was in junior high and its steadily gotten worse over the years. Normal vision is 20/20--as of last year's ophthalmologist visit, mine was 20/200. Blind as a bat, except I don't have sonar to be able to walk. I literally run into walls without my contacts or glasses.

In the past couple years, its been getting more difficult to read as well. I avoided getting reading glasses for as long as possible, but I ran out of arm length to hold my books at. On the day my son asked me why I get mad every time I read, then showed me the squinty face I always made, I gave in and got a cheap pair of reading glasses.

So I boot up my laptop yesterday evening and the screen is somewhat dim. I think it just needs to warm up. An hour later its still so dark I can barely see it and I'm beginning to wonder if its broken or what's wrong with my vision now. I can feel the wrinkles on my brow deepening from the squinty face as I struggle to see the screen. And I start to get a little panicky.

Its not until about 10 minutes later that I notice a strange icon in my system tray, the charge meter. Then I realize, its not my vision that's going, its my memory.

I had forgotten that I had unplugged the power cord during a particularly nasty part of a thunderstorm earlier. I plug it back in and BLAM! (credit to Emeril) the screen glows bright white at full power. I'm such an idiot.

In more important news, I GOT MY FIRST BLOG AWARD yesterday. A great big Thanks! to Sarah at No, Don't and Stop! for busting my award cherry and giving me the Trendy Blogger award *kicks Kanye offstage so I can finish* Make sure you drop over there and visit Sarah's blog because she's super smart, funny and I always enjoy her posts.

In the standard tradition, I now get the pleasure of recognizing ten of my favorite bloggers. My top ten Trendy bloggers are:

I love all these blogs and their authors for a variety of reasons, but the bottom line is their writing can always make me laugh. Please copy the award and pay it forward to ten of your favorite bloggers.

Biblical Proportions

2010-05-28T17:15:00.003-04:00

To Do List:

Built Ark (complete)
Gather Animals (in Progress)

'Nuff Said.

Parental Vent

2010-05-27T19:06:00.002-04:00

The countdown has begun, the nightmares commence and the panic attacks barely held at bay.

My parents arrive in less than a week.

They live about 400 miles away and that's perfectly fine by me. But usually a couple times a year they specifically make a trip up here or stop by while passing through to another destination. They either drop the date of their impending visit on me like a nuke (without an invitation) or they just show up to "surprise" us. It completely wrecks my nerves.

We're not extremely close. We don't talk every day on the phone, more like every couple of weeks. I love seeing them, I just don't really want them at my house. I'd rather drive eight hours to go to their house than have to deal with them being in "my space".

The problem is that my mother is a perfectionist. I'm not. Nor do I want to be. My house is not a showplace, its a very well lived-in home. She talks all the "don't go to a fuss for us and I don't expect it to be immaculate". The visit comes and goes. Then a few months down the road, the lectures start about taking pride in your house and eliminating the clutter. I'm 42 years old and she nags me like I'm still 12. I end up devastated and teary for days following.

So every time they decide to come visit, I spin off into a complete cleaning frenzy. By the time they arrive I'm exhausted and stressed out from trying to meet her unattainable standards. I tell myself to relax. I tell myself that it doesn't matter what my mother thinks, I'm a grown-ass woman. I tell myself that the next time she starts on me that I will tell her if she finds it that offensive, then she's no longer welcome.

But here I am this week frantically trying to wash windows, scrub out the refrigerator, herd dust-bunnies from underneath the furniture, clean light fixtures and all the other non-routine household chores into the few days lead time I was given.

I'm tired and I'm cranky. My fingers are all pruny, my hands and arms are all flaky from the cleaning products, my eyes burn from the fumes and every muscle in my body aches.

Why can't I just say to hell with it?

Behold, The Mighty Blog-Killer !

2010-05-26T17:28:00.000-04:00

They say the first step to overcoming a problem is by admitting the issue. So here I am, confessing to the fact that I am a blog-killer.

Before you go panicking and banning me from your sites, lemme explain. Some blog owners, for whatever reason, don't have a subscription button or way to follow their sites. So when I run across a blog post I really like, I check out the last couple weeks of posts. If I'm still crushing on the writer, I check to see how often they post and decide whether to add their bookmark in my "daily reads" or "weekly reads" folder.

I'm not quite sure how the whole process works, but as soon as I add a blog to my "daily read" list, the posts grind to a halt. At first I was all "hey, most are mommies like me and have busy lives". Maybe they were on vacation, maybe they were sick. So I stop checking only to find out later they started blogging again. WTF? Really? So, like any mommy with low self-esteem, it begins to dawn on me that it must be my fault. I kill blogs.

Okay, I know, not really. But I can't help the overwhelming sense of disappointment when my favorite bloggers miss a day or two. Logically I realize that family comes first and it can be difficult to find time to write each day, especially on the weekends.

But I still get pouty.

So I pout and I wonder, do our favorite bloggers really know how much they're appreciated? Do they know that they are missed when they don't post? Some might based on the amount of hits or comments. Many may not.

I'm going to pick a couple each week to be my Blogger Crushes and let them know how much I look forward to reading their posts. Unlike most awards or badges, there's only one condition, to pass it on to spread the love to your top two crushes.

This week's picks are Kris from Pretty All True and Holly from Are You Serious? I crush on both these ladies because of their wit, irreverent writing style and their fearlessness in tackling any subject. So here's a brand-spankin' new shiny badge to let you know how much I appreciate you two.

Cajun Chicken for the Soul

2010-05-25T19:06:00.000-04:00

My baby's growing up and I can't do anything to stop it. Today was his last day of school and he's now been promoted to the Third Grade. He received all kinds of honors and I'm so very proud of him, but also a little sad. I always seem to get these mixed feelings at important milestones in his life. This was his last picture as a second-grader, taken this morning while still in his jammies and blankie. Don't let the cuteness fool you, its a clever disguise.

I'm drowning my sorrows in good old Southern Sweet Tea and some Cajun Chicken. Looks yummy, huh?

Here's a recipe for the dry rub I use before baking.

Cajun Chicken Dry Rub

Ingredients

1/2 teaspoon black pepper
1/2 teaspoon white pepper
1 teaspoon salt
2 teaspoons garlic powder
2 teaspoons dried sage
1 teaspoon paprika
2 teaspoons cumin
2 teaspoons dry mustard
4 teaspoons chili pepper
1 teaspoon cayenne

Combine all ingredients. Use as a rub for poultry or seasoning. Store remainder in an air-tight container.

The chicken is a good start, but I think its going to take a tub of Cookies n' Cream ice cream to calm my spirit. Ice cream fixes everything.

Guilty Pleasures

2010-05-24T18:31:00.001-04:00

We all have them. Those things we know aren't good or healthy for us but we enjoy them anyway. I think I have more than my fair share. As embarrassing as it may be, I'm going to share a few of mine.

1. My favorite candy: Lindor Lindt Truffles Milk Chocolate. These little balls of yumminess are so rich and just melt in your mouth (minds outta the gutter people!).

2. Favorite Movies: 80s teen comedies. John Hughes. Love 'em!

3. Favorite Dessert: Cheesecake. Just plain old-cheesecake, no toppings.

4. Favorite Book Genre: Paranormal/Supernatural series. Laurell K. Hamilton, Charlaine Harris, Larissa Ione, J.R. Ward and about 100 others.

5. Favorite Drinks: Dunkin' Donuts coffee. Root Beer. Bloody Mary.

6. Favorite Music: Again with the 80s--dance music. Prince, Salt n' Pepa, Tone Loc. Hey, don't judge me!

7. Favorite Foods: Beef Fried Rice & Kung Pao Chicken; Chicken Cheese Enchiladas; Lasagna

8. Favorite TV shows: True Blood, Dexter, Bones, Sons of Anarchy, all Law & Orders, original CSI, Castle, "Reality" shows (its a sick addiction), and most recently, Doctor Who.

9. Favorite Snack: Lays Chips w/ Bacon & Horseradish Dip (sounds odd, I know. My dad got me hooked on it)

My most favoritest guilty pleasure of all? Goodnight hugs from my son. The kind where he doesn't want to let go. The kind I would be happy to sit and get all night long if it weren't for school the next morning. Why a "guilty" pleasure? Because something that makes you feel that good, just can't be good for you, right?

End of the Week Update

2010-05-23T14:21:00.004-04:00

Being awake at 5:30 a.m. on a Sunday morning shouldn't even be possible, yet I was today. The husband and son were still asleep because they didn't get in til almost one in the morning, so I used the quiet time to start redesigning my blog.

I knew had to keep the sunflower aspect because its become my totem since starting this blog. You see, a few days after my first post I was still changing colors, layouts and designs. I would settle on one look and then hated it the next time I opened the blog page. Then as I was walking into Hell-Mart, I spied one solitary bunch of sunflowers in their flower case near the entrance. I grabbed them up with the intention of doing some macro shots.

It was such a beautiful day outside when I got home that I took one, held it up against a blue sky background and snapped a pic. As soon as I saw it on the camera screen, the image resonated in me.

My first step this morning was to make a new header. The old one had a faded vintage aspect to it and while that was lovely, it just wasn't me. Add brighter colors, a gradient background and a couple of cute fonts in addition to my sunflower and I found one that is more my style. More than likely, I'll get bored with it and want to change it again in a few weeks.

Through the Blog Flow network, I've added several more blogs that I follow daily, so I grabbed the codes for those that had badges and added them to my Fave Blogs page. I also made a new background. I'm not completely happy with that, but it'll wait for another day.

Once I'm pleased with the images, I'll start in on changing the layout and format in the HTML editor to break away from the standard Blogger format.

Other updates:

** For the most part, the bugs have waved the flag of surrender against my awesome extermination tactics--except for the gnats. We had literal clouds of them flowing through the house. Until last night *insert evil laugh* I happened to notice that there were quite a few congregating in the bathroom, specifically in and around the tub. I sprayed it down with Raid and when I woke up for my 3 a.m. potty break, there were hundreds of dead enemies plastered to the fiberglass. The human intellect dominates over their tiny gnat brains!

** The ducks are still healthy and happy down at the pond. The other ducks have accepted them and I've stopped worrying about them. Now if I could just get all the cedar shavings out of my dining room.

** Completely joking, I mentioned my idea to the hubby of getting rid of all his socks and replacing them with all new identical ones. He was on board with it, only because he wants to take all the old ones to his tractor barn to use as buffing rags.

Sock It To Me

2010-05-22T20:47:00.001-04:00

"I washed a sock. Then I put it in the dryer. When I took it out, it was gone." ~Rod Schmidt

The Sock Monster in the dryer has been a long standing joke in most households--it always eats one sock out of a pair, leaving you stuck with multiple single socks.

Like most things in my life, my sock monster is just a little bit different than the norm. Mine just "borrows" the socks for a little while, then covertly slips them back into a load of laundry when I least expect it. Which is usually the day after I've given up hope of seeing them again and thrown them away.

When I became responsible for the whole family's sock supply, I thought I'd be smart and started tossing the unmatched socks in a spare basket in hopes its match would eventually show up. As the days turned to weeks and the weeks turned to months, something odd began to happen. I'm pretty sure they were matching themselves up on their own and reproducing. That has to be the explanation for the three baskets full of socks I just happened to find myself faced with today. The fact that my husband has been complaining for weeks that he has no socks is just a coincidence.

As I bit the bullet today and tackled the project, I realized a few things. First, my husband has entirely too many socks and they're all a different brand and style. Second, none of them have been white since the first time he wore them. Third, I think he holds the world's record on the most diverse substances that can be used to stain them. And lastly, I really need to do this matchmaking thing more often because more than half of my son's were at least a couple sizes too small.

Or a better solution--throw all of them away, go to Hell-Mart and buy them all exactly the same so they're all identical.

Mean Mommy

2010-05-21T19:31:00.000-04:00

I'm not sure exactly when it started, but my crankiness became apparent to me on Wednesday evening. My temper was short and I was snapping at everyone. It steadily got worse and finally reached critical mass this morning as I was trying to get the kiddo ready for school. I needed some me-time, STAT.

I get so caught up in the day-to-day needs of the family, pets and house that I often forget to take care of myself. It usually takes something drastic, like losing it and yelling at my son, for me to realize I've waited too long.

I knew if I went back to the house, the floors would be screaming to be mopped or the laundry would glare at me trying to guilt me into staying home. I pulled into a parking spot at the school, closed my eyes and took a few deep breaths to clear my mind and then decided what I was going to do. Craft store!

I needed some material to use as border for a tablecloth, but I can spend hours there, just wandering around picking up whatnots and forming ideas for future projects. It was as I was roaming that I spied the perfect material for my placemats. And it was on SALE!!! (It was originally $44.00/yard and on sale for $7.00)

I also needed some white muslin to make a homemade light box (for photography) and it was on sale as well.

The day just kept getting better and I could feel the tension flowing from me as the hours passed. I topped it off with an iced cappuccino and a slice of cheesecake.

I was able to pick up my son from school with a smile and an apology. Even though he forgave me, I still haven't quite forgiven myself yet.

Adventures of Bath Boy and Part-Time Dog

2010-05-20T11:42:00.003-04:00

Let me start by explaining that my son is one of "those" kids. You know the ones, the kind that no matter how many times they've performed a task, they must have explicit instructions every time.

Case in point, bath-time. Even though this child has taken a bath (almost) every night of his seven years, he must be told "how" to bathe each time he enters the tub. "Okay, take off your clothes and put them in the laundry room. Do you need to pee before you get in? Check the water to make sure its not too hot. Get in the water and sit down. Play for a while, then wash and call me so I can come wash your hair."

Mr. Literal must also be told every night that "bathing" means using soap. "Why is the soap dry?" "You didn't tell me to use soap!" Or when he gets in bed he needs to get under the covers (and sheet). He's a really intelligent kid, so I'm pretty sure he's doing this just to irritate me.

By the way, anyone know a good sheetrock person? I have a few mommy-head-shaped holes in my walls that I need repaired.

I know I blogged last week about my search for a family dog. We also have a part-time dog.

Technically, he belongs to my mom-in-law, who lives next door (I know, but that's a subject for another day). He wanders back and forth as he pleases, but seems to spend the bulk of his time here, including the nights. I think the acoustics must be better on our porch for his nightly 11pm-2am symphonies. The dog doesn't even blink when a stranger walks onto the porch, but let him catch the shadow of a moth flitting around somewhere in the night and he barks for 10 minutes. Five minutes later and it starts again. Its been this way every night for the past four years.

Of course, my husband and son sleep through this every night and think I'm hallucinating or something. They don't "get it" when lack of sleep causes me to pour apple juice on top of the cereal or missing the turn to the school because mommy's brain is still back at the house snuggled under the covers. Its like having a new baby--that never sleeps through the night.

I wonder if the ASPCA or PETA would have a problem with me crushing up some doggie sleeping pills and slipping them in a scooby-snack before bedtime? Or maybe I should take them and let him serenade the night as I sleep blissfully.

Generic Excuse Note #142

2010-05-19T15:24:00.002-04:00

To Whom It May Concern:

The writer of this blog can't ~~go to school~~ ~~come to work~~ think of anything relevant today due to a ~~flat tire~~ ~~death in the family~~ brain sprain incurred while ~~para-sailing~~ ~~mountain climbing~~ studying HTML. We're hoping she makes a speedy recovery. Here's a picture of ~~her cat~~ ~~her kid~~ her dinner to tide you over until tomorrow.

Balsamic chicken served on my finest Chinet.

I'm With the Bandz

2010-05-18T14:29:00.002-04:00

They're stretchy, made in bright colors and come in cute shapes...and they've become the bane of my existence.

They're called Silly Bandz or just bandz for the cool kids, one of which my son is desperately trying to become. Its the newest fad locally, or so I thought. Its thin rubber molded into shapes like animals or objects and when stretched out can be worn around the wrist.

These seemingly innocuous items have become like crack for elementary school kids, replacing the Garbage Pail Kids cards and Beanie Babies of the 80's. Recess has become like the floor of the New York Stock Exchange, kids pushing, yelling and shoving as they buy, sell and trade for the "good" ones.

I was oblivious, as usual, until my son came home one day proudly showing off a thin lime-green bracelet on his wrist. I gave him the side-eyes and a "umm, that's nice?" He sighs and rolls his eyes at his obviously moronic mom as he rolls it off, "See!" he exclaims. A few head-tilts back and forth and I can finally make out that its in the shape of a kite.

A few days later, I notice he's acquired a blue one as well (later finding out it was in the shape of a baseball cap) and start to wonder why my son is wearing bracelets. Then this morning he has them all lined up on the couch, showing them off proudly, especially his newest addition, a pink truck. The first two were free, as some enterprising 7-year old lured him in, but this last one he had to trade one of his Bakugan toys for.

At this point, my brain actually starts to work as I realize he traded a $7.00 toy for a flimsy piece of rubber. After the interrogation to find out where these kids are getting these things and a dire warning should he trade anymore of his toys, I dropped him off at school and went off to try to score some ~~crack~~ bandz (see, I'm cool like that).

I spent over 45 minutes in this drug store searching for the elusive bandz with no luck. As I moved towards the cashier, at last! But they weren't in bright colors and they were in the shapes of the local college football team (Go Vols). Thinking those were better than nothing, I grabbed a pack. Twenty-four for $4.99.

It was only when I got to the cashier that I learned the real scoop on these things. Apparently, they fly off the shelves, hotter than cabbage patch dolls. The ones I picked up had just arrived ten minutes earlier. She tells me the last batch they got sold out in less than two hours.

I googled them when I got home and ran across an auction page where a set of 47 sold for $49.00 ?!?!!!! I'm so glad there's only a week left of school. I'd need to take out a mortgage on the house to keep my kid in silly bandz.

I Am Blogger, Hear Me Snore

2010-05-17T12:09:00.000-04:00

After this weekend's successful foray into HTML coding, I've been feeling like such a Blogger warrior. I've conquered making buttons and creating tables, but there's so much more!

I want to be able to dive into the code and be able to change my backgrounds and headers on my own. I want to learn to make my own layouts and templates. I want to make all the cute little pictures, post dividers and blinkies that everyone else seems to have. I want to be able to combine my awe-inspiring Photoshop skillz with new-found html talent to create the kinds of blog elements that other bloggers want. I want to get emails asking me where I found them and be able to reply that I made it. I want to get requests for custom made items. I want to use my powers for good and offer these things for free, just because I can.

I want to go take a nap because all this optimism is exhausting.

Summertime Blues

2010-05-16T11:39:00.002-04:00

So tomorrow is Monday. More specifically, its the Monday of the last full week of this school year. Its exciting that we'll both get a break from the endless spelling lists, vocabulary tests, math homework and the daily drives to and from school. The possibility of sleeping in, past 6 a.m., looms seductively on the horizon.

There's also the dread. The loss of my daily peace and quiet time to be filled with repetitive why's and constant mind-numbing chatter. Having him ask every five minutes, "How long til Daddy gets home?", as if spending another second with me is a fate worse than death.

This summer, I have a plan. This year, I will drag him out one day a week to an educational and "fun" activity, so he will be thankful for the days he gets to stay home with his toys, games, dvds and 'round-the-clock cartoon channels. HA! I'm an evil genius. Hopefully, it will go better than the spring break incident. Fifteen minutes into "How to Train Your Dragon" at a real movie theater, he wanted to know how much longer the movie was. He made it through about forty-five minutes before he fell asleep. *sighs*

In making my summer plans, I tried to schedule things with activities, like the Museum of Science and Energy and a trip to a historic fort. There's plenty of crafting events for kids in the area and the cherry-on-top of the summer fun will be a trip to see my parents for a few days.

My guess is we'll have to abandon this experiment due to lack of interest, his, and lack of patience, mine.

I worked on a few more photos over the weekend. The morning I took these it was really foggy and I was just catching it as the sun was starting to burn through. I added a little bit more warmth to the shots and lightened them up.

This is the view from our side porch out over the field towards the pond and the tractor barn.

UPDATE: The ducklings seem to be happy at their new home down at the pond. They've made it through two days of thunderstorms and haven't drowned, been eaten by a snake or attacked by other critters. The other ducks haven't really gotten close with the babies yet, but at least they're not being hostile or territorial. I'm officially breathing a sigh of relief and stop worrying about my little darlings.

Busting My Coding Cherry

2010-05-15T18:34:00.000-04:00

Six a.m. is like the butt-crack of dawn and just too damn early to be awake on a Saturday morning. My husband and son choose to be up at that hour. I don't. Yet I was. Not because they adore me so much, they just couldn't bear to leave without smothering me in hugs, kisses and words of love. Not even frikkin' close. Thirty minutes of frantic searches for shirts, socks, shoes. Whiny child and impatient husband noises and then finally peace again.

Too much time, too much activity, entirely too early leaves mommy unable to go back to sleep. Coffee and computer time. Then something wonderful happened.

I had promised myself I would move all the blog badges to their own page so the front page wasn't so cluttered. So, did and done, but I didn't like the way it was laid out with only one button per row, making the page go on forever.

Okay, now I need to make it clear that I know absolutely nothing about html or coding. So, I did the sensible thing and looked for a widget that I could just input the coding and have it automatically place the buttons in two or three columns. No such luck. Nothing in the Blogger widgets or through google. Now, I could have just sent a message to another blogger and asked how they did it. But, I'm stubborn and impatient.

What I did find was a link showing how to code a table in html. Hmm, looks kinda difficult for a coding virgin. I start playing around with it and lo and behold, I did it! The buttons showed up, the links worked and actually opened up the bloggers' pages. But, I had set it up for three columns and the ones on the right were half cut off by the width of my page. Damn. An hour later and I have reformatted the table. Go me!

But wait. One of the buttons has some strange gobbledy-gook text next to it and a broken link symbol. Since I had just copy/pasted the button codes, I was back in unfamiliar territory. Another hour later and I had managed to fix the broken code I'd copied. Go me!

By this time, I'm feeling pretty empowered. I want my own button and html code for it on my page too! It took a lot of blood, sweat, tears and coffee. But I did it! (See the right sidebar for my button and code, as well as my Fave Blogs tab for the fruits of my labors)

In the words of Homer Simpson, "I am so smart. I am so smart. S-M-R-T. "

Grab Bag

2010-05-14T10:58:00.002-04:00

I've made it through my first week and a half of blogging without offending too many people or getting death-threats, so I thought I'd do a little hodgepodge today of updates to my previous blogs, a favorite recipe and a "kids say the darnedest things" quote.

Ducks: My husband has proclaimed the ducklings are old enough to try to introduce them to life at the pond this afternoon. Its not a moment too soon as they've been trying to quasi-leap/fly out of their bin...and coming close to succeeding. It worries me that the other ducks won't accept them and will try to chase them away. Keeping my fingers crossed and I'll post another update later.

Currently Reading: The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo (Stieg Larsson). Its not my usual type of book but I thought I'd give it a shot since Amazon kept shoving it in my face with the "You May Also Like..." emails. It was very difficult to get into, but I kept slogging on to where it finally picked up around page 40 or so.

Mother's Day: I forgot to mention that the hubby also got me an apple tree. He's decided we need an orchard for some reason. I'm suspecting he thinks I'll be making his favorite: homemade apple butter. Is he ever going to be disappointed.

Bug Battle: It rages on. Hopefully the husband will get the stuff from the co-op and get it spread under the house this weekend. I did discover that Raid is working better than Black Flag to deter the ants from the kitchen.

Photography: I took some pictures at the lake earlier this week and did some post-processing yesterday and this morning. This one was treated to look like a painting. Not some of my best work, but passable.

Quote from my Son: He's seven years old and mostly capable of bathing himself, so I let him have playtime in the bath, he washes and then I come shampoo his hair. This week after the toweling dry, "Look Mommy! I'm all clean. And I didn't even have to use soap." *sighs*

I love to cook. I love to cook foods that are bad for you, but taste sooo good. I love to cook southern-style, block your arteries with one-bite country food. Today's recipe is just that kind of food and as a bonus, its so simple even a Yankee could make it.
Baked Potatoes and Onions
10 to 12 medium potatoes, peeled and sliced
2 medium sweet onions (yellow onions work too)
margarine
salt and pepper

Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Put potatoes and onions in a deep-sided baking pan. Place tablespoon size dollops of margarine over the top and bake for 10 to 15 minutes until butter melts. Remove from oven, salt and pepper to taste, stir and repeat with the margarine on top. Cover with aluminum foil and bake for 30 minutes. Stir, re-cover with the foil and bake another 30 minutes. Continue to bake and check until the potatoes are the desired firmness to your liking. Uncover the pan and bake an additional 20 minutes to slightly brown.

I usually use a disposable aluminum baking pan because the butter will burn on the sides. But here's a great cleaning tip provided by Jen at Cabin Fever in Vermont on how to clean baked-on and burned pans.

Enjoy!

Dog Days

2010-05-13T10:59:00.000-04:00

Thanks to Kris at Pretty All True and her Sucker Dog blog post, I have narrowly avoided being subjected to the utter humiliation and shame of owning a Miniature Pinscher. I didn't want to risk carrying it and being secretly taunted by her readers. Taunting is only funny in Monty Python movies. Plus, I couldn't have hidden it in my purse because I just couldn't chance nasty doggy butt seepage in my D & B tote.

So I need to start researching again and decide what breed I'd like for our new puppy/dog. It now goes without saying that it couldn't be a tiny dog, but since it will be an inside pet, I don't want a ginormous one either. Medium-sized would be just right...like porridge...and beds...and I really need more adult socialization (or is that supervision?).

It must have a mild temperament and be good with children. I'd really hate to get one that would try to do a Hannibal Lechter on my son's face.

Third, for my own sanity, it must be a short-haired breed. I have enough problems with my own hair shedding all over the place. My husband jokes about collecting it and super-gluing it to his scalp to cover his receding hairline--adding dog fur into that just seems weird. Brushing, untangling and pulling sticker burrs out of fur after every outside trip doesn't sound like another chore I want to add to my daily list either.

Lastly, I'd like a generally "smart" breed. I know individual dogs vary, but I've had five cocker spaniels in my life and every last one of them were dumber than dirt.

There are two breeds I'm sure I don't want. A Jack Russell Terrier. One peed on me in the middle of the night once, bad memories, Not a Basset Hound either because the eyes always look hungover or depressed. They say dogs and owners end up looking alike and that just wouldn't be a good look for me.

My first thought was maybe a Schnauzer, but the more I looked at them, the more the eyebrows provoked the image of it pulling out a cigar and doing Groucho Marx impersonations. And that would be odd, right?

Maybe a Beagle? They're really cute and that's what Snoopy is and he's been famous for over sixty years! I could dress him up in an aviator cap and goggles, wrap a scarf around his neck and build him a dog house to fly. Oh, erm, looks like I'm past due for my morning meds.

The Beagle is the front-runner for now, but I'm still open to suggestions. The ducks should be moving to their new home down at the pond either today or tomorrow, so I'll be ready to take on another animal in the next couple weeks.

What's in My Camera Bag?

2010-05-12T12:07:00.001-04:00

Let me preface by saying I'm not a professional photographer, not even close. But I am a very enthusiastic amateur.

My very first camera was a Polaroid One-Step, the kind with the film cartridge that produced instant photos, that my parents gave me for Christmas when I was around twelve. I remember that day, carefully composing my shots and waiting for just the right moment to press the button, capturing my mom, dad, brother, dog, grandparents and my best friend before running out of film by early afternoon. The "special" film cost $ 6.99 if my memory hasn't failed me, which was a lot for a kid that didn't even earn an allowance. My parents refused to support my photo-mania and wouldn't buy me any more film. So, the camera was used once then stored in my closet and pretty much forgotten.

My next camera was a hand-me-down Kodak that took 110 film. I think it might have been my Mom's that she let me "borrow" for my senior year in high school. I carried it to all the special senior events, capturing candid shots of my friends. I was lucky they remained friends because I had a knack of catching the most embarrassing moments.

Flashing-forward through twenty-five years and several "cheap" cameras I finally decided to invest in something that I could become more serious about photography. I'm mostly self-taught, with the aid of books by professionals and helpful internet groups. While my raw shots are becoming better, I found my real talent is in the post-processing. I used mostly Corel/PSP since the mid-90s for graphic work and I finally invested in Photoshop CS4 last year.

One day soon, I hope to get some of my favorite shots put up on my Photography page.

Here's what I keep in my camera bag to be prepared.

1. 75-300 mm lens for scenery. I don't have a lot to spare for extra lenses so I looked for an inexpensive one. No image stabilization on this one so a tripod or something to brace the camera on is a necessity.
2. Lens caps/covers and several spare memory cards.
3. A Canon Rebel EOS XSi (also known as a 450D). An affordable DSLR and not too heavy like the more advanced models.
4. A Canon Rebel camera bag. Lots and lots of storage space, dividers with velcro and lots of pockets and zip pouches.
5. Spray bottle and a mister. Great for adding a special touch to floral macro shots.
6. Spare battery, charger and battery covers.
7. 58mm lens UV Protector.
I also carry lens cleaner, cloths, the camera manual and a compass, so if you're checking a location, you'll know where the sun is going to be and how it will affect your shots. I also carry a tripod when I know I'll need to be in a stationary spot or shooting a landscape.

On my photography "wish list" is a 50mm 1.8 general purpose lens, a 100mm macro lens, a remote shutter release and a light box set-up kit. My first purchase though will be a monitor calibration set to use on my desktop monitor. I discovered that my whites are getting blown-out during editing, until I can adjust it properly, I'm editing, saving to Flickr, then checking the appearance on my laptop. Its extra work but at least I don't end up posting pics with freakishly glowing white areas. I have a birthday in a couple months, so maybe I need to start dropping hints to the honey soon.

Ants and Crickets and Gnats...Oh My!

2010-05-11T12:07:00.000-04:00

Anyone that has ever visited a rural area has learned that the experience is going to involve some close encounters of the insect variety. For a city-girl with a paralyzing case of arachnophobia and who runs in circles screeching maniacally when a wasp or bee invades my three-foot personal space, country living provides a special challenge. My motto is that I stay out of the bugs' habitat, they should stay out of mine. It doesn't always work that way.

Every May, I've fended off a small encroachment of ants, usually only in the kitchen. No problem. An occasional spider tries to sneak in, but is quickly dispatched with spray, a steel-toed boot, fly-swatter or any other heavy object that can be used without getting in close proximity to the eight-legged freak. Every late summer/fall, there's a fly and gnat problem that's resolved by setting off a couple flying insect bombs. Easy-peasy.

This year has been different. In the past two weeks, the ants have invaded in force and with brilliant tactical expertise, infiltrating in several places at once. Treat those locations and they migrate, only to return to the original sites a couple of days later. This has been going on for over a month already. When I begged the darling husband to go get something from the co-op to treat under the house, he returns with a can of bug spray from the hardware store. Really hon? Like you haven't noticed I already have at least one can of Raid or Black Flag in every room of the house?

Next front on the war: gnats. Anyone with a child knows that they can't come in or out a door without leaving it ajar for at least five minutes. My son is no different. There's always some burning question or poignant statement its imperative he makes as soon as the door opens. Its been a big flashing "Welcome" sign for swarms of gnats this spring. Their reason for living is now clear: to buzz around my head while I'm trying to read, attracted by the lights. My solution, turn off the light and watch TV, letting them be drawn to the only other light source in the house, my husband's computer room.

The most heinous of the skirmishes is against an insidious creature we in the south call spider crickets. Scientifically known as cave or camel crickets, they look like spiders, act like crickets. Which means they jump. Two to three feet. Their defense mechanism? It jumps towards any movement in an attempt to frighten its foe away. They don't bite, but to someone, mainly me, with a fear of spiders, its akin to a horror of the highest order. Its habitat is damp, dark spaces, like say the crawlspace under our house, which is now the location of a massive infestation of these creepy-jumpy-crawlies. They're also smart enough that they've found an entryway into the house and discovered the most effective way to terrorize me. Leaping out of folded towels after my shower or launching themselves into my hair as I open the pantry door are a couple of their favorites. Coincidentally, the insecticide needed for the ants is also the best one to eradicate this plague.

The husband is so going to the co-op this weekend or I'll be moving into my hermetically-sealed saferoom equipped with internet connection and satellite TV and the rest of the family can fend for itself. Seriously, the only acceptable place for insects in my world is in a Disney movie.

Ahh, Mornings!

2010-05-10T08:12:00.000-04:00

Right now, at 8:30 a.m., is my favorite time of day. The hubby's at work, I just dropped off the boy at school and I walk into perfect quiet. I can close my eyes, take a deep breath, let go of all the mommy tension and just relax. I can now enjoy the one vice I still retain: my coffee.

I may have a cup before I leave the house, but that is purely for medicinal reasons. So I can open my eyes and be able to comprehend that red means stop, green means go and to remember to make sure the kiddo is actually *in* the car *before* I leave to take him to school.

But its right now, when I return home that I can sit down, take a sip and really enjoy the aroma and taste of my favorite drink.

I come by my addiction honestly. I remember the Christmases and summers our family spent at my grandma & grandpa's house when I was very young and how they always had a pot on the warmer. It all began with my grandma pouring a splash of java into my cup of milk and adding a bit of sugar and I was hooked. There's also the memory of my mom going on a no-sugar kick and refusing to keep it in the house. I was forced to use honey in my coffee...very dark days indeed.

During my pregnancy, I really tried to kick the caffeine habit and switched to decaf. By the end of the second week, I'd become such a raging maniac from the splitting headaches that my co-workers were begging me to at least mix it half and half. Did I get morning sickness when I was pregnant? No, in my second and third trimester, I developed an aroma-aversion to brewed coffee. It was a miserable experience (especially since my desk was within six feet of the coffee station).

I'm not a coffee snob. I don't care what country my beans come from (though I do enjoy a high-percentage blend of Kona when I can afford it). For daily use, its the Dunkin' Donuts brand they sell in the grocery store or in a pinch, Folgers. There's no fancy-shmancy brewer in my kitchen, just a plain-old Mr. Coffee with a simple on/off button. Let's face it, I'm not capable of operating anything more complicated before I've had my first cup of the day.

It's Good to be a Mom

2010-05-09T07:37:00.000-04:00

It was 7:40 a.m. and I was awakened by my son leaping through the room like Baryshnikov, joyfully yelling "Happy Mother's Day, Mom!" I know he was prompted by his Dad, as usual, but I almost cried because it was the first time he'd complied instead of mumbling something into my shirt as I forced a hug on him.

Actually, my Mother's Day started last night when a large azalea bush walked into the house on a pair of sexy (though kinda hairy) legs and really ratty looking tennis shoes. Okay, on further inspection it was my husband *holding* an azalea bush, but anyone coulda made the same mistake. Every year I get some kind of plant or flower. Then they plant it, keep it watered, the bed weeded and in general good health. Then when they bloom again the next year, I take pictures. As long as I stay at least a lens-length away, they have a good chance of surviving my black thumb (seriously, I've even killed ivy).

While I was out snapping pics of the azalea, I also got a few of the climbing roses that were my Mother's Day gift four years ago. No matter if we've had a good/bad winter, late/early spring these guys always bloom one or two days before Mother's Day. It helps me keep my faith that there is some kind of grand plan and everything happens when its supposed to and for some reason. Its up to us to figure out why and how we can grow from our experiences.

Here's to all the moms and moms-to-be out there. Enjoy the small things and keep your faith through the trying times. Its all worth it.

Hooked on Books

2010-05-08T13:12:00.000-04:00

I'm a voracious reader, so much so that my husband decided it would be cheaper for him to build my bookshelves instead of buying. This one was the second one he made and as you can see, its filled to overflowing. What you can't really tell from this picture is that except for the top, all the shelves have a second row of books behind the ones in front. I have several of them now collecting more than just books and dust, like my son's kindergarten picture and the box of hardware that was used to bolt it to the wall.
1. This one is located in my combination office/laundry room, so naturally there's some dirty clothes.
2. There are actually three of these bags (one is hiding) full of...you got it, more books. I had been begging for a new shelf last year. The request went on the infamous "Honey-Do" list in his mind, so I might get it by 2015 if I'm lucky.
3. The box for my camera. Why I'm keeping it I have no clue. But I know where it is if I need it.
4. This looks like a good place for a Stick-Up. Seriously, it *is* the laundry room.
5. A laundry basket full of shoes my son outgrew but are still in good condition. One day, I'll get them to Goodwill, maybe by the time I get that extra bookshelf.
6. The solution to my book storage problem---the box for my Kindle. The husband figured it was easier to buy that than build more shelves (especially since we were running out of wall space for them).

Here's a close-up of part of it, heavy on the Paranormal/Supernatural and Mystery genres, but I'm eclectic. I get very attached to series, especially in these two categories, so I have to buy them ALL. I have a list of bookmarks on my computer of each author that I regularly follow (I'm over 75 at this point), checking them periodically and marking new release dates on my calendar. Kinda pathetic, huh?

I'd hate to hazard a guess as to how many books I've amassed at this point, but its enough that I've been flirting with the idea of hiring a high-school student this summer to come help me get them cleaned off, sorted into categories and alphabetized. The thought of attempting that project on my own is overwhelming. Once, a friend suggested I trade them in at a book exchange. I think the look of horror on my face was enough to make her avoid that subject ever since.

Since Christmas, I've been hard at work filling my Kindle. In less than twenty weeks, I've accumulated and read almost one-hundred e-books. There would have been more, but I've been doing spring cleaning for the past couple weeks and slowed down on my reading. A dozen pairs of these cheap reading glasses are stationed strategically throughout the house, car and my purse because I never seem to remember them until I need to read something.

The e-books are convenient and easy enough to just drop the reader into my purse, but there's something just not as pleasurable. The tactile sensations of the pages (though I don't miss the paper cuts), the crack of the spine as you open it for the first time, or even the smell of a new book. I admit, I also miss the ease of being able to flip to the last couple pages to cheat and find out how it ends!

His Mistresses

2010-05-07T18:40:00.000-04:00

My husband has mistresses--eleven of them at last count--and I've grown used to sharing his affections. They're all between 50 to 80 years old, but they still have a lot of get up and go. He spends more time with them than at home and even takes our son when he visits them. He flaunts them in public, parading them around and showing them off to all his friends. My husband cruises the internet, trolling chat rooms and forums to find them. He even drove nineteen hours yesterday to pick up a new one, bringing her to our home.

This is his newest, an Allis-Chalmers 1936 Unstyled WC (not that I know what any of that means).

My dearest darling is a tractor addict. He and our son restore these antiques to either keep and show, sell or trade for more. The current residents of his tractor barn are 6 John Deeres, 3 Allis-Chalmers, 1 Farmall Cub and a Massey Harris, though there is a high probability that could change at any moment. For the most part, I don't even try to keep track.

The Allis shown above doesn't seem very impressive now, but after a few weeks in his shop the engine will be purring, more like a saber-tooth with pneumonia than a kitten and the fresh paint will gleam blindingly. I have to concede that the man is a genius with restoration. He's hauled a few in that didn't run and the primary color was rust, but were show-winners by the time he was through with them. They may not be my ideal hobby, but its always a pleasure to see how they turn out.

Another Change

2010-05-06T20:33:00.000-04:00

I'd always felt kinda *blah" about East Tennessee Mom as my blog name, but I was anxious to start blogging. I didn't take the time to give the name the proper consideration and just went with the first thing that sounded reasonable. I came to regret my rush over the last three days as I was experimenting with the design and layout.

I made the decision to go ahead and change it while I was only three posts into my new blogging adventure. Since I was changing the name, I also decided to change the URL so they would match and I was lucky enough that my choice was available at Blogger.

The new name feels right, now if I could just settle on the rest...

Still Under Construction

2010-05-05T15:23:00.000-04:00

It seems I'm having blog design OCD because I can't stop obsessing over the header, layout and colors. I find something wrong with every one I've tried so far: The free stock design was too simple, the font was too thick, the picture too dark, and I even misspelled my state name on the one I tried yesterday. I want black, then I don't want black. I want jewel tones, then I want pastels. Vector art vs. photographs. Will I ever be happy with a design to get started with? Until then, here's one of my favorite songs, maybe it will inspire me.

Under my Wing

2010-05-04T12:07:00.000-04:00

Our family had its first experience with raising ducklings two years ago when my son was somehow convinced that he wanted ducks for Easter. His father built a pen on the side of the carport, the weather was warm and they took care of the feeding and cleaning of that first dozen. My role was limited to standing outside the pen and saying things like "How Cute!" and "They're getting so big!".
In a few weeks, their feathers grew in and they were large enough to be transplanted down to the pond where they've lived happily ever since (for the most part, except for the one that got hit by a car and the couple that were caught by some of the local wildlife).

It was to my surprise when the husband came home from work a couple weeks ago with a cardboard box that was cheeping which prompted my "What have you done?" look. This was what I found inside.

Cute, Huh? Who could be mad with these little guys looking up at them?

Well, it turns out that my husband had given away the fencing that we'd used as a pen before and when I asked him what we were going to do with them, he said he'd figure something out and oh, would I mind going back to the co-op the next day to get them some chick starter? That should have been my first hint that I was going to be a lot more involved in raising these two.

Two days later and I'm now their mommy, feeding them and changing their water every few hours. That night I'm watching the late news and find out the temps are going to be down to freezing so I rush out and got them settled into their new home...my dining room.

A few more days pass and they've destroyed five cardboard boxes, tipping over their water, leaking onto the hardwood floor and I finally see that its happening when they're trying to clean themselves. Into the bathtub they went with a couple inches of water and they went nuts splashing around. Now they get "pool time" every couple days. As they've gotten bigger, I've added a bit more water each time and now they stand and clean themselves in the shallower end then go play near the drain where its deeper and they can paddle around and swim underwater.

My "babies" are a little over a month old now and are almost triple the size when they arrived. Even though its warm enough now that they could stay out on the porch, I still keep them in the dining room to protect them from the neighbor's cat I caught sneaking up on the bin one day.

I know that they'll be grown soon and I'll have a whole new set of worries about them when its time to take them down to the pond to see if they other ducks will accept them. I'm a mom and worrying is what I'm good at. I'll miss their cute little peeps and nibbling on my fingers, but I'll have another pet the fuss over once they're gone...the puppy we were supposed to be getting in Spring!

Ready, Set, Blog !

2010-05-03T21:31:00.000-04:00

Random incidents, passing thoughts, or any number of daily mundane things have left me with one wish: That I had a blog to write these things down. For weeks as that crossed my mind I've shrugged it off because why would anyone want to read my drivel? Day after day though, it continued to happen until I had an epiphany. It doesn't matter if anyone else reads it, I'm doing it for me! So it begins:

My husband is a self-proclaimed hillbilly who has lived in the boonies all his life, so I was transplanted here eight years ago after the wedding. To illustrate: as pervasive as Starbuck's are, the nearest one is over thirty minutes away.

I'm doing well in trying to adapt. Minimal traffic, fresh air (except for the occasional skunk), the peace and quiet are all pluses. The minuses are big though and I realized that Jeff Foxworthy isn't that far off with his redneck bit and I even have a couple to add.

If you feel the painted lines on the two-lane blacktop are there as merely a "suggestion"...you might be a redneck. You can almost count on any car ride requiring emergency evasive procedures, usually resulting in my two right wheels off the side of the road, because of oncoming traffic being in my lane.
If you are raising two ducklings in a Rubbermaid storage bin...in your dining room...you might be a redneck. My husband brought them home from the co-op when it was still too cold for them to live outside, so now I'm their foster mother and the kiddo's bathtub becomes their pond for a few hours each day.
If there's no room to park your car under the carport because its full of tractors...you might be a redneck. My husband's hobby is restoring antique tractors. He'll often wash then store them in the carport for a couple of days prior to big weekend shows, leaving my car out to suffer in the weather, pollen and bird bombings.

So these are just a few of the country life pleasures that I've lived with in the past couple weeks. As odd or horrendous as these may sound to those city-dwellers, I'd deal with these and a whole lot worse for the wonderful family that comes with my country life.